Holiday in Karimun Jawa Island

Essay topics:

Holiday in Karimun Jawa Island

My friends and i choosed Karimun Jawa Island because, Karimun Jawa Island is the most beautiful place in Central Java. Our vacation is not only for having fun but also for practicing and researching because Karimun Jawa has many kind species alived inside sea of Karimun Jawa.

We went to Karimun Jawa by bus and we gethered in campus at 08.00 P.M. we started our journey in the night because ship which expedition to Karimun Jawa started at 08.00 A.M. our journey have trouble at midnight in Wonosobo our bus strike but after repairing we will continued our journey. Arrived at Semarang, we moved bus. So, we continued use small bus because the bus has to be repaired at 07.00 A.M, we arrived Kartini’s harbor. We waited until 08.00 A.M.

Our journey continued with using ship. We used ship from Kartini’s harbor until Karimun Jawa during 6 hours, while in the ship we did not have activity because most of us drunk sea. Sometimes, dolpin jump and we be able saw dolpin from the ship. Arrived Karimun Jawa Island, we saw beach which clean, the water is crystal clear, and the corals which colorful. We had to took a pictuters in portal Karimun Jawa.

From harbor to homestay is not far but we brought many comodity. We needed by car. After we took a rest in home stay. We had to prepare to see sunset. Elecric city was turned on only at 06.00 P.M until 06.00 A.M.

First day, we went to cemara island. In there we were swimming from boat until shoreline practing about seagrass, seaweed, and reef checked. The coral was still fresh and colourful. In Mejangan big and small island our activities were same as in Cemara Island. In Cilik island our activities were different we were snorkling and diving in there. My friend invited me diving to help his research. Last activity, we went to captive shark. In there, we were swimming with shark coral. In there is not only shark, but we found many anemon. So, we have to be careful swimming in there.

Karimun Jawa have many island which is very natural. Many species which we could save. Do not try to damage ecosystem in there.

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Average: 5 (1 vote)
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our journey have trouble at midnight
our journey had trouble at midnight

Sentence: We went to Karimun Jawa by bus and we gethered in campus at 08.00 P.M. we started our journey in the night because ship which expedition to Karimun Jawa started at 08.00 A.M. our journey have trouble at midnight in Wonosobo our bus strike but after repairing we will continued our journey.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to will and continued

dolpin jump and we be able saw dolpin from the ship.
dolphins jump and we are able to see dolphins from the ship.

and the corals which colorful.
and the corals are colorful.

From harbor to homestay is not far
It is not far From harbor to homestay

In there is not only shark, but we found many anemon.
there is not only sharks, but we found many anemons.

Karimun Jawa have many island which is very natural.
Karimun Jawa has many islands which are very natural.

Sentence: Arrived Karimun Jawa Island, we saw beach which clean, the water is crystal clear, and the corals which colorful.
Description: The fragment which clean , is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace clean with adverb

Sentence: In there is not only shark, but we found many anemon.
Description: A preposition is not usually followed by an existential there
Suggestion: Refer to In and there

Sentence: My friends and i choosed Karimun Jawa Island because, Karimun Jawa Island is the most beautiful place in Central Java.
Error: choosed Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: Our vacation is not only for having fun but also for practicing and researching because Karimun Jawa has many kind species alived inside sea of Karimun Jawa.
Error: alived Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: We went to Karimun Jawa by bus and we gethered in campus at 08.00 P.M. we started our journey in the night because ship which expedition to Karimun Jawa started at 08.00 A.M. our journey have trouble at midnight in Wonosobo our bus strike but after repairing we will continued our journey.
Error: gethered Suggestion: gathered

Sentence: Sometimes, dolpin jump and we be able saw dolpin from the ship.
Error: dolpin Suggestion: dolphin

Sentence: We had to took a pictuters in portal Karimun Jawa.
Error: pictuters Suggestion: pictures

Sentence: From harbor to homestay is not far but we brought many comodity.
Error: comodity Suggestion: commodity
Error: homestay Suggestion: honesty

Sentence: In there we were swimming from boat until shoreline practing about seagrass, seaweed, and reef checked.
Error: practing Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: seagrass Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: The coral was still fresh and colourful.
Error: colourful Suggestion: colorful

Sentence: In Cilik island our activities were different we were snorkling and diving in there.
Error: snorkling Suggestion: snoring ?

Sentence: In there is not only shark, but we found many anemon.
Error: anemon Suggestion: No alternate word

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 9 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 12 2

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 9 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 12 2
No. of Sentences: 29 15
No. of Words: 374 350
No. of Characters: 1654 1500
No. of Different Words: 182 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.398 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.422 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.168 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 109 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 77 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 37 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 19 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 12.897 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.553 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.31 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.333 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.531 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.282 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5