An international development organization, in response to a vitamin A deficiency among people in the impoverished nation of Tagus, has engineered a new breed of millet high in vitamin A. While seeds for this new type of millet cost more, farmers will be paid subsidies for farming the new variety of millet. Since millet is already a staple food in Tagus, people will readily adopt the new variety. To combat vitamin A deficiency, the government of Tagus should do everything it can to promote this new type of millet.
As per the argument, an international development organisation has engineered a new breed of millet which has high vitamin A content. Thus author insists that to combat the deficiency in Vitamin A, government of Tagus should do everything to promote this new type of millet. But this argument is full of potholes which are without the evidences. There is indeed a requirement from author about some proof that could substantiate this argument and beget it to approval.
Firstly, author insists that there is a deficiency of vitamin A. So it can be overcomed by many other alternatives also. Why only need to promote the new variety of millet? Also it is costly and will make the debts of farmers even more. So the assumption of author that the government of Tagus should only work upon the promotion of the new variety of millet is regardlessly wrong and vague.
Secondly, author recollects that millet is the staple food of people living in the nation of Tagus. This doesn't mean that they will only love to eat millet. They will also require some variety in their diet. Thus instead of opting the new breed of millet which is indeed high in the vitamin A content, there could be the way when the fruits and vegetables rich in vitamin A are prescribe to all those who suffer from the same illness. The apples, tomatoes, strawberries, cherries etc can be made cheaper for common man. The production of these items can be made to increase instead of growing costlier type of millet.
Furthermore, author makes a conclusion that as millet is the staple item so people will readily accept the new breed of it. How can one predict? It is not possible that one can think like the people and guess what they will accept and what they will reject.
Thus to combat the problem of deficieny in vitamin A government can conduct the diagnostic test for the people under supervision of expert doctor and should advice them to overcome the deficiency.Thus argument contains lot of faults and is not acceptable.
Sentence: As per the argument, an international development organisation has engineered a new breed of millet which has high vitamin A content.
Error: organisation Suggestion: organization
Sentence: Firstly, author insists that there is a deficiency of vitamin A. So it can be overcomed by many other alternatives also.
Error: overcomed Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: So the assumption of author that the government of Tagus should only work upon the promotion of the new variety of millet is regardlessly wrong and vague.
Error: regardlessly Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Thus to combat the problem of deficieny in vitamin A government can conduct the diagnostic test for the people under supervision of expert doctor and should advice them to overcome the deficiency.Thus argument contains lot of faults and is not acceptable.
Error: deficieny Suggestion: deficient
argument 1 -- not OK
argument 2 -- not OK
argument 3 -- not OK
suggested arguments:
argument 1 - we need specific information on the scale of the subsidy that would be provided to the farmers and whether that would be sufficient to convince the farmers to adopt the new crop.
argument 2 - we are still uncertain about whether the public will readily adopt the new breed of millet. It might be that, even though the new miller breed is high on vitamin A, it is much less favorable in terms of taste and appearance compared to the millet type in current in use.
argument 3 - we need to be provided with information on the cost-benefit analysis for the government to actively promote the new breed of Millet.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: ? out of 6
Category: ? Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 349 350
No. of Characters: 1618 1500
No. of Different Words: 172 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.322 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.636 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.519 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 115 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 72 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 44 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 30 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.389 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.006 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.556 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.321 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.537 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.082 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5