123The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disag

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123 The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.

People are members of a society, living in a group meaning they need to fight against each other for the limited resources to have a better life no matter in daily life, education, or career. Some people held positive opinions for being competitive and think it is a necessary quality for development. Other people, however, think less competitive but more cooperative may increase the chance to become successful. As far as I am concerned, competition is one of the essential qualities to become succeed, but cooperation guarantee the human race continuing to propagate in the future.

According to Darwin, human beings, as well as animals and other living things in this planet, have to be capable of searching resources for their survival and updating themselves to adapt the changing environment, or they may be beaten by other species and eliminated by the nature. So it seems that competition is a natural ability for human beings. By competition, people will be endowed with more and better chances to live on.

This is especially indispensable for a successful company and effective government. In companies, encouraging healthy competition can stimulate employees' high spirit of creativeness and efficiency. So do in the inter-industries, it will boost the whole field into a higher level. For example, the competition between two giant electric companies-HTC and apple Inc. Iphone is always the leader of latest trend and has already become an icon of fashion and success. The clean design and convenient way of use possess most of the customers in smart-phone industry. However, HTC the Taiwanese mobile phone manufacturer, once known only as the maker of Windows phones, becomes the leading role in the competition with iphone. The competition ensures the cellphone industry's vigor and prevent monopolization. A healthy and moderate competitive system in government can also lead a prosperous country. Like the system of presidential election. It reveals the hidden problems of each party and people may maximum their chances to make a smarter choice on their new leader.

However, over-competition may result the fatal effects. If the leader or party becomes over competitive, they will not allow other rivals' existence to get in the way of their ruling. Leader like Hitler, his cruel and autocratic governing wound up with huge destruction of whole human race and himself. Lot of countries got involved and nearly collapsed, and their citizens suffered physical and psychologic pains from losing family members and homeland after it.

Things may get even worse nowadays if people overly fight against each other for the shortage of natural resources solely based on their own development and gain. Deforestation, food shortage, epidemic disease, air pollution and global climate change can terminate human race in the long run. Therefore, cooperation among people and countries seems extraordinarily significant. For example, in 2003 SARS, as a new epidemic disease, invaded every corner of this planet. Thousands of people died from it because there was no existing and immediately accurate medicine to tackle with the new virus. However, the timely communication among countries helps suffocate the continuously contagious of virus and mutually assistance such as delivery of relief materials to the countries which was inadequate with medicine and food guaranteed the similar pace kept by every country on this SARS war.

The world now is under the progress of globalization. Competition is required for being outstanding to individuals and countries without being devoured by other civilizations. However, if human beings expect their survival under the more complex natural conditions, cooperation is a must. Human's future needs joint endeavors and also the integrated intelligence.

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Average: 7.6 (13 votes)
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Sentence: The clean design and convenient way of use possess most of the customers in smart-phone industry.
Description: The fragment use possess most is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace possess with verb, present tense, 3rd person singular

Sentence: It reveals the hidden problems of each party and people may maximum their chances to make a smarter choice on their new leader.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by an adjective
Suggestion: Refer to may and maximum

flaws:
No. of Words: 594 350 (write the essay in half an hour)

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 6
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 31 15
No. of Words: 594 350
No. of Characters: 3142 1500
No. of Different Words: 330 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.937 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.29 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.931 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 245 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 182 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 126 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 95 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.161 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.755 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.548 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.229 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.446 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.033 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5