An international development organization, in response to a vitamin A deficiency among people in the impoverished nation of Tagus, has engineered a new breed of millet high in vitamin A. While seeds for this new type of millet cost more, farmers will be paid subsidies for farming the new variety of millet. Since millet is already a staple food in Tagus, people will readily adopt the new variety. To combat vitamin A deficiency, the government of Tagus should do everything it can to promote this new type of millet.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
Although the international development organization seems to have thoroughly though out their recommendation,I believe there are still a few questions unanswered that may prevent the new millet from being successful among the impoverished people of Tagus.
Firstly, the international development organization is assuming that "the people of Tagus will readily adopt the new variety". Even though the people of Tagus are used to millet because it is a staple food for them,we cannot assume that they will adapt to the new variety. If the organization could test out the new millet among a few people of Tagus,then we will be able to determine the how successful the new millet may be amongst the nation of Tagus before going all out and asking multiple farmers to start farming them.
Another question would be, had the international development organization tried to educate the impoverished nation of Tagus on vitamin A and the health risks related of its' deficiency. Since the new millet costs more,why not save that money and instead try to education the nation of Tagus first and see if that helps. Since it is a impoverished nation,they most likely don't have the resources and people to tell them of the health risks involved. If educated on what they can do and eat to increase their vitamin A consumption,they will gain knowledge and be able to follow through accordingly.
In conclusion, even though the new millet is a great idea,it lacks some information that may prevent it from being a worthwhile investment. If these questions were looked into we would have a better idea ahead of time on whether to go through with the new millet.
Sentence: If the organization could test out the new millet among a few people of Tagus,then we will be able to determine the how successful the new millet may be amongst the nation of Tagus before going all out and asking multiple farmers to start farming them.
Description: The word how is not usually used as a qualifier, pre
Suggestion: Refer to how
flaws:
No. of Sentences: 10 15
No. of Words: 283 350
No. of Different Words: 141 200
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 58 80
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 10 15
No. of Words: 283 350
No. of Characters: 1345 1500
No. of Different Words: 141 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.102 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.753 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.758 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 88 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 58 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 38 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 31 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 28.3 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.734 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.7 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.45 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.679 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.232 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5