People's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
It is said that a person's behaviour is the sum of the experiances he has had in his life.Many factors combine to provide shape to an individuals character,his nature
as well as his behaviour.However,most of these factors are determined by events,the occurrance of which is not in the person's hand.So,it can be said that - People's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making.
A person's childhood upbringing and early family life experiances are supposed to go a long way in determining the individual's overall character and the aspects of his behaviour,since a person is most impressionable in his childhood.However,no person on Earth gets to choose the his place of birth.A person's birth in a particular
family is an event,which in scientific terms is still considered a random one.Thus we can see that a major factor in determining a person's behaviour is entirely out of his hands i.e his place of birth.
Another factor which tends to define a person's behaviour is his role models.A person is essentially free to choose a role model,so this factor should be deterministic.But a closer observation may dispel this notion. Many times,a person's role model may be one of his parents,siblings or other relatives,so again this factor is out the person's control as one doesn't get to choose one's birthplace.Choice of any other role model is also quite random.A person may watch a movie and start following a particular actor. There is a fair chance,that he could have watched another movie and started liking another actor -- hence a change of role models.So,generally the choice of role model depends upon the the random chance of being exposed to the greatness of one role model than another.So this is also beyond the person's control.
There are many events in a person's life which tend to model his behaviour. Typically a person does not have much control over the occurrance of these events. A buisnessman living a lavish life,might find himself in poverty due to a an event like a natural disaster,a civil revolution in the country or simply a financial crunch or recession which can destroy his buisness and on which he does not have any control.Living a life of poverty his behaviour will surely change from that of arrogance to humility or in worst case to that of frustration and irritability.Thus we can see,that a complex set of factors or events tend to determine a person's overall behaviour.On most of these
factors,the person exercises no control.
Sentence: So,generally the choice of role model depends upon the the random chance of being exposed to the greatness of one role model than another.
Description: The token the is not usually followed by an article
Suggestion: Refer to the and the
Sentence: A buisnessman living a lavish life,might find himself in poverty due to a an event like a natural disaster,a civil revolution in the country or simply a financial crunch or recession which can destroy his buisness and on which he does not have any control.
Description: The token a is not usually followed by an article
Suggestion: Refer to a and an
Sentence: It is said that a person's behaviour is the sum of the experiances he has had in his life.Many factors combine to provide shape to an individuals character,his nature as well as his behaviour.However,most of these factors are determined by events,the occurrance of which is not in the person's hand.So,it can be said that - People's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making.
Error: experiances Suggestion: experiences
Error: occurrance Suggestion: occurrence
Sentence: A person's childhood upbringing and early family life experiances are supposed to go a long way in determining the individual's overall character and the aspects of his behaviour,since a person is most impressionable in his childhood.
Error: experiances Suggestion: experiences
Sentence: Typically a person does not have much control over the occurrance of these events.
Error: occurrance Suggestion: occurrence
Sentence: A buisnessman living a lavish life,might find himself in poverty due to a an event like a natural disaster,a civil revolution in the country or simply a financial crunch or recession which can destroy his buisness and on which he does not have any control.
Error: buisnessman Suggestion: businessman
Error: buisness Suggestion: business
flaws:
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
Again: Put a space after punctuation marks. E-rater is sensitive.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 6
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 447 350
No. of Characters: 2031 1500
No. of Different Words: 194 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.598 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.544 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.648 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 144 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 98 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 65 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 46 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.833 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 15.938 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.611 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.386 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.549 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.194 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5