The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree

Essay topics:

The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons or examples that could be used to challenge your position.

The issue given here states that instilling a sense of cooperation in preparing young people will help them become successful leaders in governments, industries and other such fields. I completely agree with the given statement as it is in favor of creating harmony and cooperation and abhors unnecessary competition among the youth.

Consider the case of any government as mentioned in the statement. A government is not an individual entity. It is formed by a group of people who have common interest. They come together for a common purpose: the welfare of the nation and its citizens. Now, a government can only function properly if there is trustful cooperation and harmony among the members. It can only live up to it's promises if the governing members work together supporting each other. But even a little bit of competition in them will lead to a weak government. All the members in the government are leaders of the respective ministries they are handling. But without cooperation in between them, the government will not be able to function properly and ultimately cease to exist.

Next, we have the case of industries. A industry is not led by a single person. There are board members who have to collectively take decisions, even if the industry was started by a single person. Though that person will be leading the board of members, but the industry will only benefit if the members work together, and not work against each other to gain more power. Only a leader with a vision to lead the whole industry together can be successful, and not a person who would only try to work alone. Also, competition in such industries only exists between the peer industries. Only that industry will come out as market leader whose members work better in harmony and cooperation, rather than fight for power among themselves.

On the same note, take the case of sports like football and cricket. If the players of the same team have a sense of competition among themselves like trying score more individual goals and scoring more runs at slower rate to have strike without analyzing the match situation, think about the results the team will get. Not only it will degrade the team performance, it will lead to dissemination of the team in the long run. But a sense of cooperation, a motive for playing for a cause bigger than themselves can only bring favorable results.

On the contrary, one can say that the young people will end up being weak if they are not taught to be competitive. But this is the beauty of cooperation among each other. Not only such a harmonious environment will make an individual strong, it will also make his or her accept the inner weakness and problems. Again, it can be pointed out that not all individuals can work in a group or team. With respect to this, a form of cooperation can teach such people the strengths of working together. After all, a closed fist is stronger than a single finger.

In the end, I would like to state that the society can only prosper if all its members work together for a bigger cause. This will not only generate iconic individual performances but also lead to the advancement of the society as a whole

Votes
Average: 5.4 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 473, Rule ID: LITTLE_BIT[1]
Message: Reduce redundancy by using 'little' or 'bit'.
Suggestion: little; bit
...ether supporting each other. But even a little bit of competition in them will lead to a w...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 39, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'An' instead of 'A' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: An
... Next, we have the case of industries. A industry is not led by a single person....
^
Line 5, column 237, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
.... Though that person will be leading the board of members, but the industry will ...
^^
Line 7, column 232, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'stricken', 'struck'.
Suggestion: stricken; struck
...coring more runs at slower rate to have strike without analyzing the match situation, ...
^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, so, still, after all, on the contrary, with respect to

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.5258426966 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 24.0 12.4196629213 193% => OK
Conjunction : 20.0 14.8657303371 135% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.3162921348 88% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 33.0505617978 100% => OK
Preposition: 80.0 58.6224719101 136% => OK
Nominalization: 27.0 12.9106741573 209% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2632.0 2235.4752809 118% => OK
No of words: 551.0 442.535393258 125% => OK
Chars per words: 4.77676950998 5.05705443957 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.84493438435 4.55969084622 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.70708134944 2.79657885939 97% => OK
Unique words: 236.0 215.323595506 110% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.42831215971 0.4932671777 87% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 826.2 704.065955056 117% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 6.24550561798 160% => OK
Article: 8.0 4.99550561798 160% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.10617977528 129% => OK
Conjunction: 7.0 1.77640449438 394% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.38483146067 114% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 30.0 20.2370786517 148% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 23.0359550562 78% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 46.2455283124 60.3974514979 77% => OK
Chars per sentence: 87.7333333333 118.986275619 74% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.3666666667 23.4991977007 78% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.3 5.21951772744 44% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 6.0 4.97078651685 121% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 7.80617977528 51% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 10.2758426966 165% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 5.13820224719 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.83258426966 207% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.100156186412 0.243740707755 41% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0297533788169 0.0831039109588 36% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0410815974973 0.0758088955206 54% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0667217783176 0.150359130593 44% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0322364158275 0.0667264976115 48% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.3 14.1392134831 73% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 48.8420337079 126% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.1743820225 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.44 12.1639044944 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.28 8.38706741573 87% => OK
difficult_words: 96.0 100.480337079 96% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 11.8971910112 59% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.2143820225 82% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.7820224719 85% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 54.17 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.25 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.