People's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
All men are born with the same innocence, nobody is sent to this world on a mission to be pious or evil it is actually the world and it’s circumstances that shape our behaviour and instincts. Thus describing people’s way of living as an invention of their own will be flawed.
It wont be wrong to state that our personality is a gift of our circumstances and society. Infact our way of thinking and reacting to various scenarios is carved out more or less by the world we live in. Our financial & social standing our religious views our upbringing and various aspects that are a part of our life’s story actually shape our role in it. To illustrate my point I’ll take the example of warring nations like Afghanistan or Russia these countries are also known for brave and wild people who don’t fear death as compare to the likes of peacefull societies of Canada and Switzerland where people are more inclined towards humbleness and civility. The reason for this difference is not because they were born this way but infact it’s the environment they were raised in. Simmilarly we have the example of Asian children bieng more inclined towards studies as compare to American ones this is because of the difference in social importance to be the best in studies between the two cultures.
Coming down to a more specific analysis it can be seen that most of the worlds greatest achievers in science, arts, literature, politics and sports e.t.c belong to poor families. Moreover the oppurtunities they had were very few yet they were able to make their mark, the reason that I suggest for this trend is lack of resources creates a do or die situation where winning is the only option you have and under such pressure the perfect aptitude for a champion is carved.
This may not always be the case as their might be humble and civil people in Afghanistan and Russia and societies like that of Canada and Switzerland may possess rough men too but they too might be influenced by some other aspects in their life. As I have never mentioned that the trends of the society cant cause reactive atitude in any of it’s members.
In a nutshell the way we live is determined by factors that we posess very litle command on and how these factors influence our lives is the image our behaviour reflects.
as compare to
as compared to
Sentence: To illustrate my point I'll take the example of warring nations like Afghanistan or Russia these countries are also known for brave and wild people who don't fear death as compare to the likes of peacefull societies of Canada and Switzerland where people are more inclined towards humbleness and civility.
Error: peacefull Suggestion: peaceful
Sentence: The reason for this difference is not because they were born this way but infact it's the environment they were raised in.
Error: infact Suggestion: in fact
Sentence: Simmilarly we have the example of Asian children bieng more inclined towards studies as compare to American ones this is because of the difference in social importance to be the best in studies between the two cultures.
Error: bieng Suggestion: being
Sentence: Moreover the oppurtunities they had were very few yet they were able to make their mark, the reason that I suggest for this trend is lack of resources creates a do or die situation where winning is the only option you have and under such pressure the perfect aptitude for a champion is carved.
Error: oppurtunities Suggestion: opportunities
Sentence: As I have never mentioned that the trends of the society cant cause reactive atitude in any of it's members.
Error: atitude Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: In a nutshell the way we live is determined by factors that we posess very litle command on and how these factors influence our lives is the image our behaviour reflects.
Error: litle Suggestion: little
Error: posess Suggestion: possess
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
No. of Sentences: 13 15
No. of Words: 409 350
No. of Characters: 1855 1500
No. of Different Words: 219 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.497 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.535 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.514 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 121 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 92 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 61 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 31.462 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.358 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.615 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.329 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.607 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.094 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5