Sports stars and movie stars have an obligation to behave as role models for the young people who look up to them. In return for the millions of dollars that they are paid, we should expect them to fulfill this societal responsibility.
I do not agree with the following statement because it argues that, because sports and movie stars are paid millions of dollars, they should be expected to act as role models for the young people of society. This argument is flawed because it assumes that the money that these celebrities are given go toward their good behavior and, it also assumes that these celebrities are the main influencers of young people today.
Being a sports or movie star is, in fact, one of the highest paying jobs today; however it is not for their good behavior or their leadership skills, but rather for the skill or talent that they have. Sports and movie stars are highly praised for their exceptional athleticism and/or acting ability. These skills are so exceptional that less than 5% of the people in society can reach this proficiency. They are unique individuals, and because they can play sports or act better than a majority of the population, they get paid more than the average athlete or actor. Their skill and talent are the main reasons why they are paid so much. It is not to reinforce good values and behaviors onto them.
Young people (pre-teen to pre-adult) are very easily-influenced and often instill similar values and behaviors of those they look up to. While these can be the sports and movies stars, studies have shown that main influencers of a person's character, especially in young people, are their providers and peers. Values are often instilled within a person at a young age by the parents or guardians. They shape the way their children understand and perceive reality before they even know what reality means. As they grow older, young people spend less and less time with their parents and more and more time with their friends and classmates. Because they spend so much time with these people, they end up acting or talking similarly. Young people have tangible interactions with both their parents/guardians and peers. They are actual lived experiences. Kids may never ever meet or even talk to sports or movie stars in real life; therefore, they cannot fully adopt their values and behaviors.
With the growth of globalization and the widespread use of social media, sports and movie stars have become more well-known around the world. Their faces can be see on billboard ads, tv commercials, and social media streaming. While celebrities' constant virtual presence in society does have the potential to subconsciously influence young people, the unrealistic lifestyle and impossible-to-obtain skill sets that they have make them perfect for admiration, but unreasonable to actually follow and mimic. Therefore, it is unreasonable to think that they should be the main drivers of good behavior in society.
Overall, I do not agree with this statement because it expects money to be the main driver of ideal behavior in society and underestimates the influence that real life interactions have on young people.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 7, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a sport' or simply 'sports'?
Suggestion: a sport; sports
...fluencers of young people today. Being a sports or movie star is, in fact, one of the h...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 229, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'persons'' or 'person's'?
Suggestion: persons'; person's
...s have shown that main influencers of a persons character, especially in young people, ...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, however, if, look, may, similarly, so, still, therefore, well, while, in fact
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.5258426966 118% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.4196629213 64% => OK
Conjunction : 36.0 14.8657303371 242% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.3162921348 88% => OK
Pronoun: 58.0 33.0505617978 175% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 47.0 58.6224719101 80% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 12.9106741573 70% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2445.0 2235.4752809 109% => OK
No of words: 486.0 442.535393258 110% => OK
Chars per words: 5.03086419753 5.05705443957 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.69525374022 4.55969084622 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72878995212 2.79657885939 98% => OK
Unique words: 228.0 215.323595506 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.469135802469 0.4932671777 95% => OK
syllable_count: 736.2 704.065955056 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 6.24550561798 256% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Interrogative: 0.0 0.740449438202 0% => OK
Article: 1.0 4.99550561798 20% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.10617977528 161% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.77640449438 225% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 2.0 4.38483146067 46% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.2370786517 109% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 23.0359550562 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 58.8505777021 60.3974514979 97% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.136363636 118.986275619 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.0909090909 23.4991977007 94% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.45454545455 5.21951772744 85% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 10.2758426966 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 5.13820224719 19% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.83258426966 124% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.286392911698 0.243740707755 117% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0890227898866 0.0831039109588 107% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0652211335248 0.0758088955206 86% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.170548480102 0.150359130593 113% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0576492451319 0.0667264976115 86% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.3 14.1392134831 94% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 48.8420337079 118% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.1743820225 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.89 12.1639044944 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.04 8.38706741573 96% => OK
difficult_words: 102.0 100.480337079 102% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 17.5 11.8971910112 147% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.2143820225 96% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.7820224719 93% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.