Because of the pressure of new subjects such as business studies, many schools have dropped sport or physical education (PE) from the curriculum. How important is sport or PE in a young person’s education?

Essay topic: 

Because of the pressure of new subjects such as business studies, many schools have dropped sport or physical education (PE) from the curriculum. How important is sport or PE in a young person’s education?

Nowadays, education gives men knowledge and skills. Therefore, qualified people, who are smart, are more likely to find work. They can earn a higher salary and contribute positively to society. This is the reason why schools aim to teach young people business values such a profit-sharing enterprise than to coach sport. Teenage workers, on the other hand, hardly maintain their health because they merely focus on how to get money as much as they can. In fact, this is going to take some time. Although teaching business studies in Indonesian schools is important to human life, I believe physical education such promoting sport is much more triumph to increase life expectancy. This essay will examine greatest significance to educating sport: achieving a balance between study time, family and society.

It has been for ten years after the Minister of Education launched the National Examination (UN). Many students are not passing their school. It is not because of how difficult the subjects have been tested, but there are no long gaps amongst exam shows, which result stress after studying for many hours. Some scientists believe that too much study with a non-contact sports will trigger natural strain on brain’s muscles.

What is more, the majority of children with their relatives in the past were happier than they have nowadays. What has changed is that now these people do not have any sharing information which sports, like Motor Grand Prix race, are good to start amongst families.

Finally, when people celebrate the Independence Day, football and badminton match are never left in between. All young people who become active participants definitely develop a mutual acquaintance. In the event of friendly atmosphere, strong communication would result togetherness to win their group for the competition.

As illustrated, not only teaching business but also coaching sport will be obviously important to human development. It is essential that schools adapt students to effective change for sport. The balance of the subjects within the curriculum is one of many ways.

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flaws:
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.261 0.35
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.02 0.07

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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.5 out of 9
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 333 350
No. of Characters: 1709 1500
No. of Different Words: 212 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.272 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.132 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.613 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 125 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 96 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 66 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 40 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.526 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.235 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.368 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.261 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.508 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.02 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5