You are hereCounties such as China, India and Japan have unsustainable population growths. In fact, many experts are of the opinion that the population ‘explosion’ which is now a very worrying concern, is the most serious threat to life on this planet. Give some sugg

Counties such as China, India and Japan have unsustainable population growths. In fact, many experts are of the opinion that the population ‘explosion’ which is now a very worrying concern, is the most serious threat to life on this planet. Give some sugg


marzieh's picture

By marzieh - Posted on 30 January 2013

Essay topic: 

Counties such as China, India and Japan have unsustainable population growths. In fact, many experts are of the opinion that the population ‘explosion’ which is now a very worrying concern, is the most serious threat to life on this planet.

Give some suggestions to address this problem.

In recent years, we have found new problem in the world. This new problem called explosion of population. Unfortunately, some countries like India, China have more population. We must find ways to control increasing rate of population as soon as possible.

In my opinion, the most important reason of increasing rate of population is lake of education. Consequently, the simplest way is people are educated. This education should cover all area, such as how people can control size of their family by knowing the correct ways. For education, we can use TV, the radio, and all public media. We must teach our children when they go to school or when they study in university.

Second way is increasing of public health service. For controlling size of family, people need drugs or some stuff for prevent pregnancy. In poor countries, government should better give this stuff as free. Public health service should teach people to use these staff.

In addition, governments can create a law about counter of child in a family. In China, there is this law and every family just can have one child not anymore. This law helps to government to decrease rate of population. Moreover, another useful law is every woman has permission to UN born her child. This law also helps to decrease population.

To sum up, we have many ways to controlling population. It depend on government and people that which way that they select. Some ways are against their religion and some ways are costly.

Average: 7.7 (3 votes)
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essayE-rater's picture

Sentence: Consequently, the simplest way is people are educated.
Description: The token is is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Consequently, the simplest way is that people are educated.

Sentence: It depend on government and people that which way that they select.
Description: The fragment It depend on is rare
Suggestion: It depends on government and people that which way that they select.

flaws:
No. of Words: 251 350
No. of Characters: 1188 1500
No. of Different Words: 137 200
Avg. Sentence Length: 11.952 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 3.457 7.5

Getting better. Try to write the essay around 350 words.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 251 350
No. of Characters: 1188 1500
No. of Different Words: 137 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.98 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.733 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.502 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 79 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 51 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 37 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 28 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 11.952 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 3.457 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.381 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.3 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.548 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.135 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5