The diagrams below show how chocolate is made and how the price of a chocolate bar is divided up among those involved in the process

Essay topics:

The diagrams below show how chocolate is made and how the price of a chocolate bar is divided up among those involved in the process.

The diagram represents the mathod of chocolate making and the pie chart highlights information how the price of chocolate is dividied in those which are related in process.

It is clearly seen that first of all chocolate is granded in grander then waste is saprated and chocoa liquod is contain in a big chocoa liquor. After that half proportion of liquod is sent in industry for making chocolate and left chocolate liauod is sent for pressing then some pressed chocolate is made ready with chocoa butter for industrial chocolate, sugar and other ingredients are mixed in industrial chocolate to make a chocolate bar. Some pressed is convert in chocoa powder and sent in food industry .

The given chart highlights the prices of chocolate bar after completed making process , maximum (37%) price is divided cost of ingredients and overhrads where as minimum (4%) to farmer. Supermaket is given 3% less than cost of ingredients and overheads but 15% is divided tax and chocolate company is divided 10% out of 100%

It is, there for, clear that each stage is important from making to given price , if one step is missed then whole process is distroyed.

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Average: 7.1 (66 votes)
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Comments

Sentence: It is clearly seen that first of all chocolate is granded in grander then waste is saprated and chocoa liquod is contain in a big chocoa liquor.
Description: The fragment grander then waste is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace then with adjective

Sentence: The diagram represents the mathod of chocolate making and the pie chart highlights information how the price of chocolate is dividied in those which are related in process.
Error: dividied Suggestion: divided
Error: mathod Suggestion: method

Sentence: It is clearly seen that first of all chocolate is granded in grander then waste is saprated and chocoa liquod is contain in a big chocoa liquor.
Error: liquod Suggestion: liquid
Error: saprated Suggestion: sperated
Error: granded Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: chocoa Suggestion: cocoa

Sentence: After that half proportion of liquod is sent in industry for making chocolate and left chocolate liauod is sent for pressing then some pressed chocolate is made ready with chocoa butter for industrial chocolate, sugar and other ingredients are mixed in industrial chocolate to make a chocolate bar.
Error: liquod Suggestion: liquid
Error: liauod Suggestion: liquid
Error: chocoa Suggestion: cocoa

Sentence: Some pressed is convert in chocoa powder and sent in food industry .
Error: chocoa Suggestion: cocoa

Sentence: The given chart highlights the prices of chocolate bar after completed making process , maximum 37 price is divided cost of ingredients and overhrads where as minimum 4 to farmer.
Error: overhrads Suggestion: overheads

Sentence: It is, there for, clear that each stage is important from making to given price , if one step is missed then whole process is distroyed.
Error: distroyed Suggestion: destroyed

flaws:
No. of Spelling Errors: 12 2

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 12 2
No. of Sentences: 7 10
No. of Words: 194 200
No. of Characters: 930 1000
No. of Different Words: 105 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.732 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.794 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.59 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 68 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 50 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 32 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 27 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 27.714 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.823 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.571 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.461 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.786 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.126 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4