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IELTS writing task I


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By Eldjan - Posted on 14 December 2013

Essay topic: 

IELTS writing task I

The graph illustrates date about the number of channel viewers regarding to time of News, over one year period.

Overall, what stands out from the graph is that both trends of news in 1pm and 6pm not so sharply changes, as trends of 9:30 pm and 11pm news, over the whole period. Another interesting point is that the number of viewers of the 9:30 pm and 1pm news at the end of the year, almost remained at the same spot as at the beginning.

Looking at the details, as regards the figure for the 1 pm News. The initial number of viewers in January was approximately 5 million, then the graph witnessed a fluctuation fall until November and at the end of the year the trend reached under 3.5 million. If we look at the figure for 6 pm, the trend gradually went up to around 4 million viewers between January and May, then sharply dropped to 1 million. After, the graph highlights a considerable rose, first sharply and then gradually and reached at the point of 3 million viewers per day. As for the number of channel’s viewers at the 1 pm News, the trend remained stable at approximately 1.5 million mark, over the 12- month period.

By contrast, the trend of the last News in the graph began in May, then sharply rocked to 4 million in August and after surged four times and hit a trough at the December.

Average: 7.5 (2 votes)
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essayE-rater's picture

Sentence: Overall, what stands out from the graph is that both trends of news in 1pm and 6pm not so sharply changes, as trends of 9:30 pm and 11pm news, over the whole period.
Description: The fragment so sharply changes is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace sharply with adjective

flaws:
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.889 0.12
No. of Words: 244 200

Write the essay in 20 minutes

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 9 10
No. of Words: 244 200
No. of Characters: 1034 1000
No. of Different Words: 115 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.952 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.238 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.375 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 68 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 49 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 18 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 13 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 27.111 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.078 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.889 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.495 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.712 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.177 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4