In June 1996, an experimental flu vaccine was trialled in a large country town on female only. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main feature and make comparison where relevant.

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In June 1996, an experimental flu vaccine was trialled in a large country town on female only.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main feature and make comparison where relevant.

The chart below shows information about flu cases in large country town and the experimental of trial flu vaccine for female only.

According to the bar chart, there were the numbers of inhabitants’ deaths from flu between March to May and June to August. Death of female in June to August was the highest than female death in March. However, there was no figure of male in March to May.

This line charts shows about the number of cases of flu rates for males and female. Females were rose dramatically from February to June with 3,500 cases of flu and then a gradual fell to 2,500 cases in September. Between September and December female stay the same in 2,500 cases of flu. However, for males there were lower than females’ number of cases.

The third chart shows the percentage of females who get recipient of new vaccine because they have most of risk of flu. The highest female group receive new vaccine was female aged over 65 years old with thirty-five percent. There were females who not receive the vaccine with twenty-eight percent. However, females hospitalized had 13 percent of receive new vaccine.

Overall, this chart was representative of female to experiment new flu vaccine.

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Females were rose dramatically ...
Suggestion: Can you re-write this sentence?

Sentence: However, females hospitalized had 13 percent of receive new vaccine.
Description: The token of is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to of and receive

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 13 10
No. of Words: 205 200
No. of Characters: 966 1000
No. of Different Words: 98 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.784 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.712 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.36 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 60 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 45 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 16 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 14 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.769 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.758 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.462 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.409 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.694 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.144 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 4