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"Should people convicted of minor crimes do community service rather than go to prison". Comment


ashwani1982's picture

By ashwani1982 - Posted on 26 April 2011

What are your views on the question, “Should people convicted of minor crimes do community service rather than go to prison?”

Over the centuries, punishments for different criminals are subject of great consideration. Weather it’s a punishment for a serious crime like murder, or a low intensity crime like abusing a man, there is always a hot debate, among law makers, social workers & layman citizens. People convicted for minor crimes are treated the same way as for major crimes convicts. I firmly believe, criminals with minor crimes should have a different law & enviornment for punishment. Although, it’s a matter of hot debate, yet I am illustrating some facts.

To begin with, a great amount of tax paid by civilized citizens, is utilized to maintain prisons for these convicts. Letting minor convicts to do community jobs, being a part of community, will help to reduce the over-burdened cost. Furthermore, the saved money can be utilized for well fare of society.

Secondly, community can be benefited by aquiring & utilizing a free source of human energy to fulfil society needs. For example, these convicts can be punished or forced to repair damage roads, provide care to patients in the hospitals, maintain old age homes or orphan houses. However, these are possibilities of low quality or service but that can be controlled by providing necessary trainings & supervising their work by authorities.

In addition, minor crime convicts will be living with their families, as a part of community, which could help them to become nobel citizens of country.

Last but not least, this technique can help these convicts to devekop the will & strength, to survive in the society after their trial or prisonment. Enviornment in the prison force or motivate these minor offenders to become real big criminals, whilst having punishment within community can put a barrier for such consequences.

To summarize it all, I would recommend to enforce this law in near future, so that both community & convicts families as well, can be benefited. It could be a beginning of new era of humanity, where law & order punish criminals, but with an intention to provide them opportunities & enviornment to become civilized citizens of our nation.

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ashwani1982's picture

Hi
Please review the above essay & provide your review comments considering following points:
(1) Spelling mistakes
(2) Grammatical mistakes
(3) Topic coverage
(4) Structure of Essay
(5) Completeness of essay
(6) Sentence formation
(7) DOs & DONTs for IELTS

essayE-rater's picture

Sentence: Over the centuries, punishments for different criminals are subject of great consideration.
No grammatical errors
Sentence: Weather it's a punishment for a serious crime like murder, or a low intensity crime like abusing a man, there is always a hot debate, among law makers, social workers & layman citizens.
Description: The tag a pronoun, personal, nominative, 3rd person singular is not usually followed by a
Suggestion: Refer to it's and a
Sentence: People convicted for minor crimes are treated the same way as for major crimes convicts.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to crimes and convicts
Sentence: I firmly believe, criminals with minor crimes should have a different law & enviornment for punishment.
No grammatical errors
Sentence: Although, it's a matter of hot debate, yet I am illustrating some facts.
Description: The tag a pronoun, personal, nominative, 3rd person singular is not usually followed by a
Suggestion: Refer to it's and a
Sentence: To begin with, a great amount of tax paid by civilized citizens, is utilized to maintain prisons for these convicts.
Description: A preposition is not usually followed by a comma
Suggestion: Refer to with and ,
Sentence: Letting minor convicts to do community jobs, being a part of community, will help to reduce the over-burdened cost.
No grammatical errors
Sentence: Furthermore, the saved money can be utilized for well fare of society.
Description: The word well is not usually used as an adjective
Suggestion: Refer to well
Sentence: Secondly, community can be benefited by aquiring & utilizing a free source of human energy to fulfil society needs.
No grammatical errors
Sentence: For example, these convicts can be punished or forced to repair damage roads, provide care to patients in the hospitals, maintain old age homes or orphan houses.
No grammatical errors
Sentence: However, these are possibilities of low quality or service but that can be controlled by providing necessary trainings & supervising their work by authorities.
No grammatical errors
Sentence: In addition, minor crime convicts will be living with their families, as a part of community, which could help them to become nobel citizens of country.
No grammatical errors
Sentence: Last but not least, this technique can help these convicts to devekop the will & strength, to survive in the society after their trial or prisonment.
Description: The word will is not usually used as a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to will
Sentence: Enviornment in the prison force or motivate these minor offenders to become real big criminals, whilst having punishment within community can put a barrier for such consequences.
No grammatical errors
Sentence: To summarize it all, I would recommend to enforce this law in near future, so that both community & convicts families as well, can be benefited.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to convicts and families
Sentence: It could be a beginning of new era of humanity, where law & order punish criminals, but with an intention to provide them opportunities & enviornment to become civilized citizens of our nation.
Description: The fragment order punish criminals is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace punish with verb, past tense

essayE-rater's picture

Sentence: Over the centuries, punishments for different criminals are subject of great consideration.
No spelling errors
Sentence: Weather it's a punishment for a serious crime like murder, or a low intensity crime like abusing a man, there is always a hot debate, among law makers, social workers & layman citizens.
No spelling errors
Sentence: People convicted for minor crimes are treated the same way as for major crimes convicts.
No spelling errors
Sentence: I firmly believe, criminals with minor crimes should have a different law & enviornment for punishment.
Error: enviornment Suggestion: environment
Sentence: Although, it's a matter of hot debate, yet I am illustrating some facts.
No spelling errors
Sentence: To begin with, a great amount of tax paid by civilized citizens, is utilized to maintain prisons for these convicts.
No spelling errors
Sentence: Letting minor convicts to do community jobs, being a part of community, will help to reduce the over-burdened cost.
Error: over-burdened Suggestion: over burdened
Sentence: Furthermore, the saved money can be utilized for well fare of society.
No spelling errors
Sentence: Secondly, community can be benefited by aquiring & utilizing a free source of human energy to fulfil society needs.
Error: aquiring Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: fulfil Suggestion: fulfill
Sentence: For example, these convicts can be punished or forced to repair damage roads, provide care to patients in the hospitals, maintain old age homes or orphan houses.
No spelling errors
Sentence: However, these are possibilities of low quality or service but that can be controlled by providing necessary trainings & supervising their work by authorities.
No spelling errors
Sentence: In addition, minor crime convicts will be living with their families, as a part of community, which could help them to become nobel citizens of country.
Error: nobel Suggestion: noble
Sentence: Last but not least, this technique can help these convicts to devekop the will & strength, to survive in the society after their trial or prisonment.
Error: prisonment Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: devekop Suggestion: develop
Sentence: Enviornment in the prison force or motivate these minor offenders to become real big criminals, whilst having punishment within community can put a barrier for such consequences.
Error: whilst Suggestion: while
Sentence: To summarize it all, I would recommend to enforce this law in near future, so that both community & convicts families as well, can be benefited.
No spelling errors
Sentence: It could be a beginning of new era of humanity, where law & order punish criminals, but with an intention to provide them opportunities & enviornment to become civilized citizens of our nation.
Error: enviornment Suggestion: environment

Everything is fine for (3) Topic coverage (4) Structure of Essay (5) Completeness of essay and (6) Sentence formation, i just don't have have any suggestions for you donsidering (7) DOs & DONTs for IELTS.