Some people think that strict punishments for driving offences are the key to reducing traffic accidents. Others, however, believe that other measures would be more effective in improving road safety. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Some people think that strict punishments for driving offences are the key to reducing traffic accidents. Others, however, believe that other measures would be more effective in improving road safety. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Recent accident statistics indicate that the number of accident in the road and highway has risen dramatically. In this way, a group of people believe that strict sentences have a positive effect in the offenders’ behavior. Others, however, would be arguing that not only punishments do not have suitable impact in the drivers’ treatment, but it also creates a lot of difficulty in the society.

On the one hand, encountering to new rules that police office and local council are approved such as financial fines, guilty people effort to avoid of doing something illegally. If drivers know that drink-driving, drivers speeding, and other sort of misdeed have a heavy penalties, they would be more concern to their driving. For instance, drink-driving is increasing especially near the Christmas; inconsiderate drivers usually consume more alcohol compared with other time of the year and they could not control themselves in the road, therefore, guilty drivers have broken all the rules of the Highway Code without concentration to pedestrian and cyclist. Both pedestrian and cyclist are innocent victims in the road.

On the other hand, government and authorities should pay more attention to this situation by creating educational programme and effective advertisement in the broadcast. Increasing against this sort of offence, the culture of societies may be improved in diverse aspects. Teachers have responsibility at school to teach the pupils how they can be a useful member of society. In addition, the media producers could prepare the learning programme for extensive range of ages.

To sum up, in my opinion, using cultural and educational matters in different ways have more effect to reduce the number of traffic-related accidents although the various kind of sentences could be have positive influence in drivers attitude. In this way, both government and individual have responsibility to prevent of driving offences and to increase the level of social culture.

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Average: 6.6 (5 votes)
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would be arguing that not only punishments do not have suitable impact in the drivers’ treatment, but it also creates a lot of difficulty in the society.
Description: not only ... but also ... is not used properly

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 13 15
No. of Words: 310 350
No. of Characters: 1630 1500
No. of Different Words: 182 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.196 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.258 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.913 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 130 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 107 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 69 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 47 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.846 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.098 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.615 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.338 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.572 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.06 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5

The essay is great, the mark should be 7.5 out of 9. because 'not only ... but also' ... is not used properly in the beginning of the essay, so we gave it 7.0 only.

From the attributes of this essay, we couldn't find flaws exactly, but you can put more content in the future essays:
No. of Words: 310 350

350 words will be ideal.

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