In today's competitive world, many families find it necessary for both parents to go out to work. While some say the children in these families benefit from the additional income, others feel they lack support because of their parents' absence.
In commercial world both parent have to go out and work but this situation has some side effect. Some people argue women must be stay at home and take care of children and other people do not agree with opinion.
In my view, when both parent work, children achieve remarkable benefits. Firstly, they could go to private schools or get better education. Secondly, they could go more travel. Finally, parent could buy anything for their children such as toys, cloths, bike. In additional, these children are most independent than other children because their parents most of the time are absent. For example, in during of my life, I learn that I must do my duty at home because my mother cannot do all housewife duty alone. We must considerate that today commercial situation become worst, unemployment's rate increases so both parent have to work.
Although, there is some disadvantages in family that both parent work . Sometimes children do not great their homework because they need parents' help. Also these children are most vulnerable from crimes or be friends with bad people. In fact, in such as family parent do not pay attention enough to their children, they give them just money without love.
To sum up, I believe that it is necessary both have to work. They must do their duty in society also they are responsible for their children. They have to raise them up well so they must aware how to create balance between work life and personal life.
Sentence: We must considerate that today commercial situation become worst, unemployment's rate increases so both parent have to work.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by an adjective
Suggestion: replace considerate with consider
Sentence: Sometimes children do not great their homework because they need parents' help.
Description: An adjective is not usually followed by a determiner, possessive
Suggestion: Refer to great and their
flaws:
No. of Words: 251 350
No. of Characters: 1170 1500
No. of Different Words: 143 200
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.688 21.0 (need more compound or complex sentences)
Sentence Length SD: 5.181 7.5
More words wanted for arguments.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 251 350
No. of Characters: 1170 1500
No. of Different Words: 143 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.98 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.661 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.33 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 74 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 51 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 33 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 18 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.688 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.181 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.75 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.351 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.527 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.109 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5