You are going to have a family party in a private room a hotel Write a letter to the hotel manager and say Why do you need to use this private room What do you need them to provide for the party Inquire about the price of the food you are ordering

Essay topics:

You are going to have a family party in a private room a hotel. Write a letter to the hotel manager and say
• Why do you need to use this private room?
• What do you need them to provide for the party?
• Inquire about the price of the food you are ordering.

Dear Sir/Madam,

I am writing to you regarding to do a party in a private room and need some information about the price of food in your hotel.

Firstly, I want to celebrate my 4th marriage anniversary on 14th May with my wife and two years old son. For this celebration, I would like a personal room because I do not like to share my special days with other people. Moreover, I have the desire to spend some time with my family on that day and this method of celebration also suites to my pocket. Furthermore, I need some arrangements for that day, such as a chocolate cake with greeting written on it, beautiful decoration of the room, soft drinks like coca-cola and some vegetarian snacks after 5 minutes of our arrival. Additionally, some toys are necessitated for my boy, especially cars if possible.

Finally, my family is pure vegetarian. Therefore, I would be grateful if you could send me the rate list of vegetarian items available at lunch and dinner in your hotel.

Looking forward to your reply,
James Smith.

Votes
Average: 5.3 (3 votes)
Essay Categories
IELTS Writing Task I - IELTS Academic

Comments

such as a chocolate cake with greeting written on it, beautiful decoration of the room
such as a chocolate cake with greetings written on it, beautiful decorations of the room

flaws:
Need to polish sentences. Look, a lot of sentences start with subject 'I':

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 10 10
No. of Words: 182 200
No. of Characters: 814 1000
No. of Different Words: 119 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.673 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.473 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.655 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 47 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 37 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 26 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 20 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.2 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.274 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.7 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.377 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.705 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.129 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 3 4