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You are going to another country to study. You would like to do a part-time job while you are studying, so you want to ask a friend who lives there for some help. Write a letter to this friend. In your letter - Give details of your study plans - Explain w

Essay topics: You are going to another country to study. You would like to do a part-time job while you are studying, so you want to ask a friend who lives there for some help.
Write a letter to this friend. In your letter
- Give details of your study plans
- Explain why you want to get a part-time job
- Suggest how your friend could help you find a job

Darby's picture

Dear ___________ ,

Hello. This is Darby who is one of your best friends. I am writing this letter to ask you to help me get a part-time job when I will be there to study in university next year.

Firstly, as you know I will study Graphic arts in university from next year for 4 years. Additionally, I am aware that you are working at a restaurant as a chef these days.

If I go to university, I need some money to pay bills like power, a rental accommodation fee, and internet because I will rent a room for myself. It should be too expensive and I can’t afford them without working. Therefore, I would like to get a job although it is just a part-time job.

Could you help me find a job? If your owner will look for any workers such as a kitchen hand, cashier or waiter, or your friends want to give up their job, please let me know in order to apply for it. In case you do that, I will really appreciate you and I will treat you to a dinner.

I am really looking forward to hearing from you.

Thank you so much.

All the best,

Darby,

Votes: 
Average: 7 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 17, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
Dear ___________ , Hello. This is Darby who is one of y...
^^
Line 3, column 108, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...this letter to ask you to help me get a part time job when I will be there to study in un...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 274, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...like to get a job although it is just a part time job. Could you help me find a job? ...
^^^^^^^^^

Discourse Markers used:
['first', 'firstly', 'if', 'look', 'really', 'so', 'therefore', 'such as', 'you know']

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.198275862069 0.220444632235 90% => OK
Verbs: 0.176724137931 0.167888034529 105% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0387931034483 0.0606518309736 64% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0387931034483 0.0506257000042 77% => OK
Pronouns: 0.14224137931 0.118615021944 120% => OK
Prepositions: 0.0991379310345 0.107062808482 93% => OK
Participles: 0.0215517241379 0.041066498444 52% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.36822414739 2.54303337028 93% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0431034482759 0.0385302599488 112% => OK
Particles: 0.00431034482759 0.00132118243153 326% => Less particles wanted.
Determiners: 0.0689655172414 0.0714148451538 97% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0344827586207 0.0191574576366 180% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.00862068965517 0.00930345855455 93% => OK

Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 1058.0 1141.60824742 93% => OK
No of words: 207.0 206.134020619 100% => OK
Chars per words: 5.11111111111 5.53046319177 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.79308509922 3.78085437643 100% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.202898550725 0.284621296913 71% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.149758454106 0.211203875043 71% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.0724637681159 0.133321485273 54% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.048309178744 0.0843313296314 57% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.36822414739 2.54303337028 93% => OK
Unique words: 131.0 127.690721649 103% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.632850241546 0.622163163488 102% => OK
Word variations: 64.7861892359 62.8969750728 103% => OK
How many sentences: 14.0 12.9587628866 108% => OK
Sentence length: 14.7857142857 16.4300151701 90% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.863056935 44.7399317507 100% => OK
Chars per sentence: 75.5714285714 90.9928171075 83% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.7857142857 16.4300151701 90% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.642857142857 0.613754768223 105% => OK
Paragraphs: 9.0 7.22680412371 125% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 2.54639175258 118% => OK
Readability: 29.7615596963 37.5504026743 79% => OK
Elegance: 0.89156626506 1.13073093955 79% => OK

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.487361568125 0.331212695627 147% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.0897308523545 0.0927372745006 97% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0844897876126 0.0736520305886 115% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.67048966978 0.662452444078 101% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.267228027882 0.233577193048 114% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.152803402206 0.122183219658 125% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.116606740535 0.0765303033291 152% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.0817282767901 0.110270004696 74% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0756739466222 0.120535355502 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.165707092721 0.120397337282 138% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.142820646855 0.113578534861 126% => OK

Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 7.45360824742 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.48453608247 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.0206185567 99% => OK
Positive topic words: 6.0 4.54639175258 132% => OK
Negative topic words: 0.0 1.0824742268 0% => More negative topic words wanted.
Neutral topic words: 3.0 2.62886597938 114% => OK
Total topic words: 9.0 8.25773195876 109% => OK

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Rates: 72.4157303371 out of 100
Scores by essay E-rater: 6.5 Out of 9

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