You are hereSome people think that the increase of cheap air travel has brought many benefits while travel others argue that this develpment has its drawbacks to the world’s encironment and resources. Discuss these two points of view. Whats your opinion?

Some people think that the increase of cheap air travel has brought many benefits while travel others argue that this develpment has its drawbacks to the world’s encironment and resources. Discuss these two points of view. Whats your opinion?


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By Domilina - Posted on 20 January 2014

Essay topic: 

Some people think that the increase of cheap air travel has brought many benefits while travel others argue that this develpment has its drawbacks to the world’s encironment and resources. Discuss these two points of view. Whats your opinion?

It is true that with the emergency of many economic air travel today, travelling has becoming easier. Nevertheless, it has brought many benifit to the country and also to the people interms of economy, social or other welfare purposes. However, with the development of these air travel, many environment and other natural resources have to be sacrifice for this purposes. This essay intent to share some of the reason.

In the oldern days, it is probably only the rich people are able to travel by plane. With the successful development of cheap air travel such as “Air Asia”, many business people have shift into this area of business and thus bringing many advantages to the people. Firstly by opening air travel business, this company need to hire more worker such as pilot, cabin crew, marketing, chef etc and therefore providing more job opportunity for the people. Secondly, not only the rich, the poor or the middle class people are now able to travel with the affordable air fares. In this way, by allowing more people to travel to other countries and more visitors to come, this means that there will be more trading to take place thus, improving the economic of a country. Finally, it is by travelling that perhaps people can learn about other’s culture and way of life, and therefore help one to enrich their knowledge and opportunity.

Contrary, there are drawbacks that this business can cause especially to the environment. Firstly, in order to produce a plane, few natural resources are needed such as titanium, wood, nickle etc. Not only that, petrol that derive from crude oil is needed to operate the plane to be able to fly. Next, when the plane begin to fly, it will emits hot smoke from the exhaust fumes which eventualy will make the temperature of the environment to increase and inturn will cause global warming. Finally, when more air travel starting to develop, there will be more airport needed to be build and this means to say there will be more trees needed to be cut down to make the landline and more animals will lost their habitat.

In conclusion, there are convincing arguments how the emergence of air travel could bring benifits to the people. However in my opinion, in order to reduce the drawbacks that it can cause to the environment, goverment should monitor and limit the development of this businesses.

Average: 8 (1 vote)
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essayE-rater's picture

Sentence: However, with the development of these air travel, many environment and other natural resources have to be sacrifice for this purposes.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to this and purposes

Sentence: Contrary, there are drawbacks that this business can cause especially to the environment.
Description: The fragment Contrary , is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace Contrary with On contrary

Sentence: Next, when the plane begin to fly, it will emits hot smoke from the exhaust fumes which eventualy will make the temperature of the environment to increase and inturn will cause global warming.
Description: The fragment plane begin to is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace begin with verb, past tense
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Suggestion: Refer to will and emits

Sentence: Nevertheless, it has brought many benifit to the country and also to the people interms of economy, social or other welfare purposes.
Error: interms Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: benifit Suggestion: benefit

Sentence: In the oldern days, it is probably only the rich people are able to travel by plane.
Error: oldern Suggestion: older

Sentence: Next, when the plane begin to fly, it will emits hot smoke from the exhaust fumes which eventualy will make the temperature of the environment to increase and inturn will cause global warming.
Error: inturn Suggestion: intern
Error: eventualy Suggestion: eventual

Sentence: Finally, when more air travel starting to develop, there will be more airport needed to be build and this means to say there will be more trees needed to be cut down to make the landline and more animals will lost their habitat.
Error: landline Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: In conclusion, there are convincing arguments how the emergence of air travel could bring benifits to the people.
Error: benifits Suggestion: benefits

Sentence: However in my opinion, in order to reduce the drawbacks that it can cause to the environment, goverment should monitor and limit the development of this businesses.
Error: goverment Suggestion: government

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 8 2

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 8 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 402 350
No. of Characters: 1892 1500
No. of Different Words: 190 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.478 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.706 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.379 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 125 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 88 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 57 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 25.125 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.103 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.75 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.346 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.548 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.07 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5