Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Teachers should be paid according to how much their students learn. Give specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Teachers should be paid according to how much their students learn. Give specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

Teachers play an important role in the society. They are the ones who teach the students, with commitment, the required knowledge and education to build the future of every country. Some people believe that the teachers should be paid according to how much their students learn, others disagree. In my view, this policy has not the rational logic it must have, and I completely disagree with it for the following reasons.

First, students’ interests, talents, and capacities of learning are different . Regarding the inability of one student in learning the new subjects, theories,or methods, we should not blame the teacher. On the other hand, if a student is fast learning with profound knowledge of everything, we should not award only the teacher for that matter, but also the student and maybe his/her parents, who may have played a crucial role in their child’s achievements. For example, when I was studying in high school, in Ahvaz, we were a class of thirty, with diverse backgrounds and talents in various topics. One of my classmates had a slow-paced trend towards mathematics, which in general is a sophisticated topic both to teach and to learn. Although my teacher worked hard to explain the formulas in a tangible and understandable way for everyone, my fellow classmate wasn’t able to keep in track with other students and failed the course. As you can see, If we have decided to pay the teacher based on the result of that student, we really wouldn’t compensate for her/his efforts.

Second, teachers may become dishonest. If we were going to take a materialistic approach to the teachers’ regarded profession, then the teachers would be willing to foster students to be good grade-achievers, not good thinkers. For example, there was a time in my school years that my elementary school’s administrator changed his policy towards teachers’ salary. He declared that the higher the students’ grades, the more the teacher receives. I unbelievably observed how this statement influenced some teachers’ procedure. They only thought the modules they were going to test students on, so that students can get higher grades. As a result of this strategy, students not only didn’t receive the requisite instruction, but also changed their perception about teachers. Although we can’t question all the teachers based on a few exceptions, we cannot also deny the harmful effect of these minority of teachers on morality of students. This experience taught me to never put a price on something that has a moral value.

In conclusion, though some may think it’s a good idea to pay teachers based on their students’ learning, I disagree with it. I believe that the student’s learning does not only depend on the teacher, but also it depends on his/her capabilities. Moreover, students may become dishonest in order to gain more money. We should examine every decision from different aspects, before we agree to put it into practice.

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student’s learning does not only depend on the teacher, but also it depends on his/her capabilities.
Description: 'Not only...but also' is not used properly. can you re-write this sentence?

flaws:
In the second paragraph, the arguments and the example are duplicated.

don't use 'not only..not...'. You can use 'neither...nor' or 'either...or'

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 24 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 490 350
No. of Characters: 2376 1500
No. of Different Words: 251 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.705 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.849 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.677 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 180 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 141 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 100 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 44 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.417 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.751 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.29 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.441 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.119 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5