In general, people think that it is less important for people to live as a member of the extended family than in the past. They support that extended family makes people to be stressful because they have to consider a lot of family members. However, the notion does not reflect the stance that I hold and should not be thought about in a different light. I believe that today’s people are necessary to live in the extended family because young people in the family are able to be guided by family members and learn how to cooperate with others.
First of all, living as a member of the extended family allows people to be guided by their members. To be specific, as modern society is becoming competitive, parents have no opportunity to care their children. Most of parents are likely to pass their children to caring service, such as kinder garden. However, like grandparents, they are able to care their grandchild and also have child-caring experience. Further, during their life, they have experienced a lot of matters, which could guide their grandchildren with their valuable experiences. It makes young people to follow the correct path at an early age. For example, when I was a kid, our family was the extended family with grandparents. They always teach me a lot of things, such as how to live their valuable life without fail. It makes me to guide the best path to life and eventually, I realized that I did not fail in my life because I do everything what I planned. Thus, this shows that it is more important for people to live as a member of the extended family in order to follow the correct path at an early age.
Moreover, the extended family allows people to learn about how to cooperate with others. In other word, the globalized world requires companies more competitive. Along this phenomenon, companies also require people with a lot of abilities, especially cooperating with other people. This is because in business, people could not do anything without the help from others. However, today’s people are becoming selfish and arrogant, due to the fact that they could not care other people in family. Thus, people are able to learn how to cooperate with others as a member of the family. For instance, after graduated the university, I had a lot of interviews with companies where I applied. At that time, all of interviewers among companies question me about my experience cooperating with others. I always answered them my experience living as a member of the extended family and they were impressed by my stories because these stores are not normal. Finally, I became a programmer of Samsung electronics corporations. As a result, this proves that the extended family is more important for people to learn about how to cooperate with others.
To sum up, I believe that it is more important for people to be a member of the extended family. This is because they are able to follow the correct path at an early age and learn about how to cooperate with other. Consequently, the importance of my views cannot be underestimated in that it can kill two birds with one stone for the reasons I have mentioned above.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 212, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'Most of', you should use 'the' ('Most of the parents') or simply say ''Most parents''.
Suggestion: Most of the parents; Most parents
... no opportunity to care their children. Most of parents are likely to pass their children to ca...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'consequently', 'finally', 'first', 'however', 'if', 'moreover', 'so', 'thus', 'for example', 'for instance', 'in general', 'such as', 'as a result', 'first of all', 'to sum up']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.2088091354 0.229887763892 91% => OK
Verbs: 0.161500815661 0.158761421928 102% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0848287112561 0.0866891130778 98% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0456769983687 0.046263068375 99% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0734094616639 0.0685040099705 107% => OK
Prepositions: 0.146818923328 0.118717715034 124% => OK
Participles: 0.0228384991843 0.0351676179071 65% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.7097979256 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Infinitives: 0.047308319739 0.0309702414327 153% => OK
Particles: 0.00163132137031 0.00188951952338 86% => OK
Determiners: 0.0864600326264 0.0887237588012 97% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.00978792822186 0.0209618222197 47% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0163132137031 0.0139019557991 117% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 3146.0 2387.08602151 132% => OK
No of words: 545.0 408.028673835 134% => OK
Chars per words: 5.77247706422 5.86048508987 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.83169070408 4.48200974243 108% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.350458715596 0.338922669872 103% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.236697247706 0.251872472559 94% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.166972477064 0.174417080927 96% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.104587155963 0.112833075102 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.7097979256 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 208.0 212.727598566 98% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.381651376147 0.524397521467 73% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 44.2903553843 59.2087087015 75% => OK
How many sentences: 28.0 20.6684587814 135% => OK
Sentence length: 19.4642857143 20.5533526081 95% => OK
Sentence length SD: 28.8739342943 48.84282405 59% => OK
Chars per sentence: 112.357142857 120.699889404 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.4642857143 20.5533526081 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.571428571429 0.644075263715 89% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.5376344086 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.54480286738 18% => OK
Readability: 43.1340104849 45.7405998639 94% => OK
Elegance: 1.3488372093 1.45489161554 93% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.307517284403 0.300154397459 102% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.134821283889 0.103427244359 130% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.105092973798 0.0752933317313 140% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.4634966754 0.497263757937 93% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.144283696985 0.151897553556 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.124147421388 0.114077575197 109% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0742728498942 0.0781384742642 95% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.496950548074 0.336927656856 147% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0270221796728 0.067059652881 40% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.25378353713 0.210909579961 120% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0344214239987 0.0618886996521 56% => The ideas may be duplicated in paragraphs.
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8870967742 109% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.86379928315 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.91756272401 224% => Less neutral sentences wanted.
Positive topic words: 12.0 8.42114695341 142% => OK
Negative topic words: 4.0 2.4623655914 162% => OK
Neutral topic words: 9.0 2.75985663082 326% => OK
Total topic words: 25.0 13.6433691756 183% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Less content wanted. Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.