TPO-17 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Most advertisements make products seem much better then they really are.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Products is an important part of our lives. There are a variety of products that people can buy, it is neccesary to inform people about new products. Some people agree with the idea that most advertisments make products seem much better than they really are; others disagree. I completely agree for two important reasons.
The first reason is that there are economy problems. Problems such as unemployments, famines result in people buy things that they are really need. In fact, demand for buying products decreases. For example, my father's friends, who has a computer company, which thier works is selling personal computers and Laptop, is recently bankrupted. Acording to his, because people prefer to use their old computer that they had instead of buying new brand computer, the number of selling a day was decreased by less than five computer. These problems result in more rivals. So, companies try to advertise thire products to sell them somewhat they can. As you can see deacresing in demands result in advertise products much better they really are.
Another reason is that companies try to make more money. Although it is not ideal, amost of companies try to sell thier products to be able to afford pay thier workers and employees. For example, I have worked in a company that they produced TV set. I was employed as a manager in testing section where I test sets. One time I saw an advertismen about our compnay's product. It was unfortunately upsetting, when I realized that the company advertised our products in a way that they realy were not. I talket to my boss about our the advertisment. And he said they had to because of some problems. It was not moral and I resigned.
To sum up, although it does not ideal, most advertisement make products seem much better than they really are not only because of economy problems but also because of making more money. Government should implement a new program to control these advertisments.

Votes
Average: 6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 142, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'needed'.
Suggestion: needed
... people buy things that they are really need. In fact, demand for buying products de...
^^^^
Line 2, column 227, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...reases. For example, my fathers friends, who has a computer company, which thier ...
^^
Line 2, column 316, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...s selling personal computers and Laptop, is recently bankrupted. Acording to his,...
^^
Line 2, column 645, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...roducts to sell them somewhat they can. As you can see deacresing in demands resul...
^^
Line 3, column 82, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ke more money. Although it is not ideal, amost of companies try to sell thier pro...
^^
Line 3, column 151, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to pay'
Suggestion: to pay
...ell thier products to be able to afford pay thier workers and employees. For exampl...
^^^
Line 3, column 210, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...nd employees. For example, I have worked in a company that they produced TV set. ...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, really, so, for example, in fact, such as, to sum up

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 13.8261648746 36% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 44.0 43.0788530466 102% => OK
Preposition: 35.0 52.1666666667 67% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1624.0 1977.66487455 82% => OK
No of words: 333.0 407.700716846 82% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.87687687688 4.8611393121 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.27180144563 4.48103885553 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.65186760061 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 178.0 212.727598566 84% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.534534534535 0.524837075471 102% => OK
syllable_count: 500.4 618.680645161 81% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Interrogative: 2.0 0.994623655914 201% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 14.0 20.1344086022 70% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.5098064852 48.9658058833 91% => OK
Chars per sentence: 70.6086956522 100.406767564 70% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.4782608696 20.6045352989 70% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.04347826087 5.45110844103 56% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.5376344086 126% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8709677419 59% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 3.85842293907 207% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.88709677419 164% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.227173527899 0.236089414692 96% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0642866473514 0.076458572812 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0892959022619 0.0737576698707 121% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.158432021433 0.150856017488 105% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0541596086493 0.0645574589148 84% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.8 11.7677419355 75% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 65.73 58.1214874552 113% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.6 10.1575268817 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.43 10.9000537634 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.84 8.01818996416 98% => OK
difficult_words: 74.0 86.8835125448 85% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.0 10.002688172 60% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 7.6 10.0537634409 76% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.