TPO-24 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?One of the best ways that parents can help their teenage children prepare for adult life is to encourage them to take a part-time job.Use specific reasons and examples

Parents all over the world try to teach their children the best qualities that enable them to face the hardships of life. I do agree with the statement that one of the best ways that parents can help their children prepare for adult life is to encourage them take a part-time job. I will explore the reasons for my stance in the following paragraphs.

To begin with, it is essential in our contemporary life to teach our children how to be independent and responsible. I believe that children who are accustomed to work at early age will be more dependent and responsible. Children should not take every thing in life for granted that because they feel that their parents will help them when they need. They should learn that the real life out there is not a piece of cake, on the contrary, it is a continuous struggle in many levels since they will be adults which they have to meet the needs of their families without waiting for help form any body. A good example of this is my case when at early age my parents allowed me to have a part-time job. At the beginning, I find some difficulty to adapt the new lifestyle of commitment and responsibility. However, things with time became much easier and I learned a lot of this experience.

Furthermore, having a part-time job is a good chance to save some money and have financial support for the future. In this modern life where the needs of humans became more than it were in the past, it always good idea to have some lucrative income to have a better life quality. The money earned from this job could be used in many ways that enhance your future. For instance, you could save money for your future education like going to a prestigious university. Or even it could be used in recreation activity like travelling and exploring the world which will provide a unique opportunity that builds your character and increase your knowledge. Going back to my own expreice, when I worked this part-time job, I used the money gained to buy a laptop and I was very happy about it since it was the first thing I buy with my own personal money.

In conclusion, I believe that motivating the children to have a part-time job has many positive effects on the children personality. They will to be more independent and responsible, besides to earning money that they could use to buy their needs.

Votes
Average: 6.6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 586, Rule ID: FROM_FORM[4]
Message: Did you mean 'from'?
Suggestion: from
...their families without waiting for help form any body. A good example of this is my ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 591, Rule ID: ANY_BODY[2]
Message: Did you mean 'anybody'?
Suggestion: anybody
... families without waiting for help form any body. A good example of this is my case when...
^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, first, furthermore, however, if, so, for instance, in conclusion, on the contrary, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 9.8082437276 143% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 18.0 11.0286738351 163% => OK
Pronoun: 61.0 43.0788530466 142% => OK
Preposition: 57.0 52.1666666667 109% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1924.0 1977.66487455 97% => OK
No of words: 420.0 407.700716846 103% => OK
Chars per words: 4.58095238095 4.8611393121 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.52701905584 4.48103885553 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.57082885423 2.67179642975 96% => OK
Unique words: 199.0 212.727598566 94% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.47380952381 0.524837075471 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 619.2 618.680645161 100% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Interrogative: 1.0 0.994623655914 101% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.3837085004 48.9658058833 91% => OK
Chars per sentence: 106.888888889 100.406767564 106% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.3333333333 20.6045352989 113% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.83333333333 5.45110844103 107% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.309297721957 0.236089414692 131% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.108350385289 0.076458572812 142% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.146274274382 0.0737576698707 198% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.233618203287 0.150856017488 155% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.178359297152 0.0645574589148 276% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.8 11.7677419355 100% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 58.1214874552 97% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.58 10.9000537634 88% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.67 8.01818996416 96% => OK
difficult_words: 77.0 86.8835125448 89% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 66.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.