Do you agree or disagree technology has made children life less creative than in the past. support your answer with reasons and examples.
Technology has the most important part in our lives. We use it in our works in our study and many more. Some people would agree that technology reduce the children creativity, others would disagree. In my view, I would strongly refutes that technology negatively effects on children because of few important reasons.
First, the technology helps them to learn from other countries. Now a days, most of children play games and do their home works on internet. Consequently, they could chat and share their works on the net and they could get and give many benefits. For instance, I could remember before two weeks ago my son Tom was working on his project. He had one idea about how to build new care from recycle materials. He was very confused about the idea and he did not know from where he could start. He kept searching in the internet about how the others children in his age that might done something like that. After few hours of searching, he found that there is one kids living in Mexico city who used the recycle cartoon paper to create a small car. Additionally, my son kept chating with him about how did he start and how was his final work. After all, my son learned a lot from him and he dedicate his time to create and to finish his car in the exact time. As a result, he did an amazed work that no one could imagine that small child did that. As you can see, technology helped my child to chat with others children and get many positive things to better their creativity.
Second, children improve their skills. When children want to do their works, they should use develop instrument to help them to do it in professional way. They would use laser pen to draw a colorful picture and to be unique from others. For example, I could remember one of my student in drawing class. He was very willing in drawing new faces but for few months he was draw it by his pen and all his pictures were beautiful but were like the other children pictures it did not differ from them at all. Once day, he found there is an instrument that use laser to give a beautiful color for the pictures. Surprisingly, he bought it and use it. As a result, all his pictures were unique and fabulous.
In sum, technology has many positive impact in children creativity. It not only help them to learn from other culture or countries, but also to enhance their skills. So, all of us could support using technology in childhood.
Some people would agree that technology reduce...
Suggestion: Some people would agree that technology reduces...
In my view, I would strongly refutes that ...
Suggestion: In my view, I would strongly refute that ...
Sentence: He kept searching in the internet about how the others children in his age that might done something like that.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to others and children
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to might and done
Sentence: After all, my son learned a lot from him and he dedicate his time to create and to finish his car in the exact time.
Description: The fragment he dedicate his is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace dedicate with verb, past tense
Sentence: As you can see, technology helped my child to chat with others children and get many positive things to better their creativity.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to others and children
Description: The word better is not usually used as a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to better
Sentence: He was very willing in drawing new faces but for few months he was draw it by his pen and all his pictures were beautiful but were like the other children pictures it did not differ from them at all.
Description: The token was is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to was and draw
Sentence: Additionally, my son kept chating with him about how did he start and how was his final work.
Error: chating Suggestion: No alternate word
flaws:
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Avg. Sentence Length: 16.333 21.0
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 22 in 30
Category: Excellent Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
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No. of Words: 441 350
No. of Characters: 1924 1500
No. of Different Words: 202 200
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No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 28 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
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Sentence Length SD: 7.029 7.5
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Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.437 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.207 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5