You have receive a gift of money. The money is enough to buy either a piece of jewelry you like or tickets to a concert you want to attend. Which would you buy ? use specific reasons and details to support your answer

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You have receive a gift of money. The money is enough to buy either a piece of jewelry you like or tickets to a concert you want to attend. Which would you buy ? use specific reasons and details to support your answer

Money is very important. If I have much money and I have choice jewelry or tickets. I will buy jewelry, Jewelry like investment. I will explain my opinion.

Firstly, I buy jewelry if I have much money. I buy jewelry because I think jewelry can be used for investment because investment can be used to necessary suddenly. I choose jewelry because jewelry price sometimes have high price than if save money , money value never change. Aim of investment is when we have problem that depends on money. We can sale our jewelry. Jewelry very easy to sale. All people can buy it which depend on their money .

If we need to much money, we can come to mortgage and we can get our jewelry at the time besides that investment in the form saving later. However, Jewelry use to style. The people use jewelry such as ring, necklace and many other. Sometimes many people that use jewelry as gift to wedding, birthday, celebration and the rest.

Likewise accessory can increase degree. For example, many people that believe when they use jewelry are rich people. Therefore , many become receiver with many jewelry that they use as a result, many jewelry unoriginal. Most of them believe that if, they have many jewelry , they are rich people. Consequently, many people use jewelry to get belief from that they get benefit such as in work world and trader to consumer. Many people make and sale unoriginal jewelry, consumer can get it everytime that want with cheap price.

To sum up, I will buy jewelry if I have much money. Jewelry use to investment than land or house whenever ticket. I get such as land n house like if I need much money to sale it need time that very long than investment as jewelry.

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Average: 5 (2 votes)
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Sentence: I get such as land n house like if I need much money to sale it need time that very long than investment as jewelry.
Description: The fragment it need time is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace need with verb, past tense

flaws:
No. of Different Words: 129 200
Avg. Sentence Length: 12.5 21.0

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 16 in 30
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 300 350
No. of Characters: 1341 1500
No. of Different Words: 129 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.162 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.47 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.254 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 86 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 67 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 28 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 18 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 12.5 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.538 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.583 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.403 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.564 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.212 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5