You have just received a letter from an overseas university saying that your IELTS bandscore of 6 is too low for admission to any of its Master’s Courses ( you need 6.5)Write a letter to the admissions officer. In your letter• Introduce yourself.• E

Dear Sir or Madam

I am writing in regard to the letter i have received from your university, indicates that my IELTS score is not appropriate for getting the admission for master degree.

My name is Paolo Maldini and i have a bachelor degree in communication from one one of the most prestigious universities of Milano. It has been two months ago that i have applied for foreign communication in your university. While i was surfing the university website i recognized that the documents required were my passport, bachelor degree and Ielts, it was not mentioned anything relevant to the Ielts score.

I would like to know whether there is any alternative that could be used instead of the Ielts document. Since i have made plans for starting my studies in the next academic year, that would be next month. Furthermore this time is not long enough for me to be prepared for this exam.

I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Yours faithfully,
Paolo Maldini

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 154, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ppropriate for getting the admission for master degree. My name is Paolo Maldi...
^^
Line 5, column 77, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: one
...a bachelor degree in communication from one one of the most prestigious universities of...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 232, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...communication in your university. While i was surfing the university website i re...
^
Line 5, column 269, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...le i was surfing the university website i recognized that the documents required ...
^
Line 7, column 206, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Furthermore,
...cademic year, that would be next month. Furthermore this time is not long enough for me to ...
^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
furthermore, look, so, while, in regard to

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 7.48453608247 147% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 4.92783505155 61% => OK
Conjunction : 3.0 5.05154639175 59% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 5.0 3.03092783505 165% => OK
Pronoun: 27.0 32.9175257732 82% => OK
Preposition: 16.0 26.3917525773 61% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 3.85567010309 78% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 815.0 937.175257732 87% => OK
No of words: 167.0 206.0 81% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.88023952096 4.54256449028 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.59483629437 3.78020617076 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.75912133601 2.54303337028 108% => OK
Unique words: 104.0 127.690721649 81% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.622754491018 0.622605031667 100% => OK
syllable_count: 257.4 290.88556701 88% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.41237113402 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.13402061856 88% => OK
Article: 0.0 0.824742268041 0% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 1.83505154639 109% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.463917525773 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 1.44329896907 69% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 9.0 12.6804123711 71% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 18.0 16.3608247423 110% => OK
Sentence length SD: 52.8683433483 44.8134815571 118% => OK
Chars per sentence: 90.5555555556 76.5299724578 118% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.5555555556 16.8248392259 110% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.66666666667 4.34317383033 107% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.29896907216 93% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 2.54639175258 196% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 7.41237113402 54% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.49484536082 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 3.94845360825 127% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.243398768518 0.216113520407 113% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0911897311019 0.0766984524023 119% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0817748374522 0.0603063233224 136% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.151711679583 0.12726935374 119% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.109297781068 0.0580467560999 188% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.8 8.37731958763 129% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 70.7449484536 87% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 3.82989690722 230% => Smog_index is high.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 7.45979381443 122% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.02 8.71597938144 126% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.03 7.59969072165 106% => OK
difficult_words: 37.0 41.2886597938 90% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 8.62886597938 168% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 8.54432989691 108% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 8.15463917526 110% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.