38 The following appeared in a memo from the new vice president of Sartorian, a company that manufactures men's clothing."Five years ago, at a time when we had difficulties in obtaining reliable supplies of high-quality wool fabric, we discontinued produc

Essay topics:

38 The following appeared in a memo from the new vice president of Sartorian, a company that manufactures men's clothing.

"Five years ago, at a time when we had difficulties in obtaining reliable supplies of high-quality wool fabric, we discontinued production of our alpaca overcoat. Now that we have a new fabric supplier, we should resume production. This coat should sell very well: since we have not offered an alpaca overcoat for five years and since our major competitor no longer makes an alpaca overcoat, there will be pent-up customer demand. Also, since the price of most types of clothing has increased in each of the past five years, customers should be willing to pay significantly higher prices for alpaca overcoats than they did five years ago, and our company profits will increase."

The topic was about Sartorian company discontinued alpaca overcoat five years ago due to unreliable supplies and now they are ready to produce again as they have a new supplier and claim their old market. The argument based on unwarranted reasons and flawed for the following reasons.

First of all, the author claimed that they stop their production due to the unreliable supplier and now they have a new supplier. but the author does not provide any evidence that proves that the new supplier is reliable. And on what basis the author determine the reliability, on quantity, cheap or expensive. It might be possible that the earlier supplier had a better quality product so that they can not supply in prolific quantity. Because of the quality, the customer loved them. And now if the quality is cheap customers might not buy it. It might be possible that the production was stopped because of labor shortages not because of the supply shortage.

Another claim the author provided is that since the company does not make alpaca overcoat for five years and no other major competitors making them, there will be a huge demand. Although the author does not provide any survey data that bolster his claim. It might be possible that the companies considered to be major competitors five years ago, are not anymore in the existence and new companies emerged. It might be also possible that five years ago alpaca overcoat was in fashion but not anymore, that is why other companies stop making it, there is no demand for it. The company should have surveyed that customers if they really want the overcoat rather than just depends on intuition.

the author also claimed that customers will pay more for the overcoat as there is a huge demand and price of the clothing is increased in five years. It might be possible that as the previous supplier provided a high-quality raw material, people like that and if the quality is low now people might not pay higher money, besides we are not sure there is a huge demand of the overcoat. It might also possible that the customers buy the overcoat because it was cheaper compared to other companies overcoats. It might also possible that only certain clothing prices are at high and people might not willing to pay a higher price for an overcoat.

The argument is flawed and based on unwarranted reasons and the argument failed to provide any convincing data that proves that there is a huge demand of the alpaca overcoat and customers willing to pay higher prices for the overcoat.

Votes
Average: 8.3 (3 votes)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 130, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
...plier and now they have a new supplier. but the author does not provide any evidenc...
^^^
Line 3, column 178, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Although” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...king them, there will be a huge demand. Although the author does not provide any survey ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
...rather than just depends on intuition. the author also claimed that customers will...
^^^
Line 4, column 506, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
... compared to other companies overcoats. It might also possible that only certain c...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, first, if, really, so, first of all

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 26.0 19.6327345309 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 11.1786427146 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 19.0 13.6137724551 140% => OK
Pronoun: 42.0 28.8173652695 146% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 29.0 55.5748502994 52% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 8.0 16.3942115768 49% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2089.0 2260.96107784 92% => OK
No of words: 435.0 441.139720559 99% => OK
Chars per words: 4.80229885057 5.12650576532 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.56690854021 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.43993939831 2.78398813304 88% => OK
Unique words: 167.0 204.123752495 82% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.383908045977 0.468620217663 82% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 666.0 705.55239521 94% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 52.4507947754 57.8364921388 91% => OK
Chars per sentence: 109.947368421 119.503703932 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.8947368421 23.324526521 98% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.89473684211 5.70786347227 51% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0994441543919 0.218282227539 46% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0358920633142 0.0743258471296 48% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0333340816373 0.0701772020484 47% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0603034247654 0.128457276422 47% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0356471004996 0.0628817314937 57% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 14.3799401198 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 48.3550499002 119% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.86 12.5979740519 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.34 8.32208582834 88% => OK
difficult_words: 72.0 98.500998004 73% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

argument 1 -- OK

argument 2 -- OK

argument 3 -- OK
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 5.0 out of 6
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 435 350
No. of Characters: 2052 1500
No. of Different Words: 158 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.567 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.717 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.381 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 147 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 109 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 74 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 31 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.167 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.335 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.364 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.574 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.151 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5