The following appeared in a memo from a vice president of Quiot Manufacturing.
"During the past year, Quiot Manufacturing had 30 percent more on-the-job accidents than at the nearby Panoply Industries plant, where the work shifts are one hour shorter than ours. Experts say that significant contributing factors in many on-the-job accidents are fatigue and sleep deprivation among workers. Therefore, to reduce the number of on-the-job accidents at Quiot and thereby increase productivity, we should shorten each of our three work shifts by one hour so that employees will get adequate amounts of sleep."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
In a memo, it is stated that the number of on-the-job accidents at Quiot can be minimized by reducing the working hour of the job by one hour. Although at first glance, the author's recommendation apprears to be somewhat convincing, but further reflection reveals that it is based on three unwarranted assumptions.
During the past year, Quiot Manufacturing had 30 percent more on-the-job accidents than at the near by Panoply Industries plant.The author assume that on-the-job accidents at Quiot are comparable to on-the-job accidents at Panoply.However, the definition of on-the-job accidents may be different at different firms.For example, maybe Quiot treats small injuries as on-the-job accidents, while Panoply consider only serious injuries as on-the-job accidents.
Even if they have the same standard of on-the-job accidents .We cannot assume that the two plants have the same working environment.For example, there may be lots of giant machines in the Quiot Manufacturing, and it is dangerous when controlling the heavy machine in the plant.As a result, 30 percent of the on-the-job accidents could be rather common.
More over, we still need to know the exact total of the on-the-job accidents and all the workers in the plant.It can only be comparable when we get the base of the number.We may not be frustrated if the exact number is small.For instance, there may be one people injured in Panoply Industries plant, while three in the Quiot Manufacturing.The data here seems everything is well.That is why the information is still needed.
In addition, the author only use the one year data to improve that Panoply Industries plant is better than Quiot Manufacturing.However, this assumption is unwarranted because things rarely remain the same over extended period of time.The fact that happened past year is not a sound evidence to draw a conclusion that shorten the work shift is a brilliant choice.Most injuries happen by chance and are not likely to occur on a regular basis.Readers need the number on-the -job accidents over the past few year before making any judgement.
Experts say that significant contributing factors in many on-the-job accidents are fatigue and sleep deprivation among workers.The assumption here is that the reasons of on-the-job accidents happened in the Quiot Manufacturing and Panoply Industries plant is relative.Nevertheless, there are still many other reasons about the accident.
In conclusion, the author's recommendation as it stands now is full of flaws due to its reliance on unwarranted assumptions. If the author is able to provide more reliable data for the above assumptions and offer more evidence (probably in the form of a systematic research study), then it will be possible to fully evaluate the viability of the proposed recommendation to reduce the working duration by one hour.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 10 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
No. of Sentences: 10 15
No. of Words: 465 350
No. of Characters: 2341 1500
No. of Different Words: 211 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.644 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.034 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.874 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 165 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 131 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 98 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 69 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 46.5 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 25.129 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.8 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.427 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.814 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.155 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 7 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 174, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...one hour. Although at first glance, the authors recommendation apprears to be somewhat ...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 96, Rule ID: NEAR_BY[1]
Message: Did you mean 'nearby'?
Suggestion: nearby
...t more on-the-job accidents than at the near by Panoply Industries plant.The author ass...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 129, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: The
...at the near by Panoply Industries plant.The author assume that on-the-job accidents...
^^^
Line 3, column 140, Rule ID: MASS_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: 'assumes'.
Suggestion: assumes
... by Panoply Industries plant.The author assume that on-the-job accidents at Quiot are ...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 232, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: However
...able to on-the-job accidents at Panoply.However, the definition of on-the-job accidents...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 316, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: For
...nts may be different at different firms.For example, maybe Quiot treats small injur...
^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[2]
Message: “Even if” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...us injuries as on-the-job accidents. Even if they have the same standard of on-the-j...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 60, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...he same standard of on-the-job accidents .We cannot assume that the two plants hav...
^^
Line 5, column 62, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: We
... same standard of on-the-job accidents .We cannot assume that the two plants have ...
^^
Line 5, column 133, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: For
...lants have the same working environment.For example, there may be lots of giant mac...
^^^
Line 5, column 278, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: As
...trolling the heavy machine in the plant.As a result, 30 percent of the on-the-job ...
^^
Line 7, column 111, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: It
...idents and all the workers in the plant.It can only be comparable when we get the ...
^^
Line 7, column 172, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: We
...able when we get the base of the number.We may not be frustrated if the exact numb...
^^
Line 7, column 226, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: For
...frustrated if the exact number is small.For instance, there may be one people injur...
^^^
Line 7, column 340, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: The
... while three in the Quiot Manufacturing.The data here seems everything is well.That...
^^^
Line 7, column 379, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: That
....The data here seems everything is well.That is why the information is still needed....
^^^^
Line 9, column 128, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: However
...lant is better than Quiot Manufacturing.However, this assumption is unwarranted because...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 220, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...gs rarely remain the same over extended period of time.The fact that happened past year is not...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 235, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: The
...n the same over extended period of time.The fact that happened past year is not a s...
^^^
Line 9, column 363, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Most
...en the work shift is a brilliant choice.Most injuries happen by chance and are not l...
^^^^
Line 9, column 441, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Readers
... not likely to occur on a regular basis.Readers need the number on-the -job accidents o...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 501, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun year seems to be countable; consider using: 'few years'.
Suggestion: few years
...ber on-the -job accidents over the past few year before making any judgement. Experts...
^^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 128, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: The
...gue and sleep deprivation among workers.The assumption here is that the reasons of ...
^^^
Line 11, column 269, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Nevertheless
...nd Panoply Industries plant is relative.Nevertheless, there are still many other reasons abo...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 20, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...out the accident. In conclusion, the authors recommendation as it stands now is full...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, may, nevertheless, so, still, then, well, while, for example, for instance, in addition, in conclusion, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 13.6137724551 88% => OK
Pronoun: 23.0 28.8173652695 80% => OK
Preposition: 73.0 55.5748502994 131% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2410.0 2260.96107784 107% => OK
No of words: 449.0 441.139720559 102% => OK
Chars per words: 5.36748329621 5.12650576532 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.60321845022 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.26824800658 2.78398813304 117% => OK
Unique words: 218.0 204.123752495 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.485523385301 0.468620217663 104% => OK
syllable_count: 748.8 705.55239521 106% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 9.0 19.7664670659 46% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 49.0 22.8473053892 214% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 137.868518506 57.8364921388 238% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 267.777777778 119.503703932 224% => Less chars_per_sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 49.8888888889 23.324526521 214% => Less words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 15.5555555556 5.70786347227 273% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 7.0 5.15768463074 136% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 25.0 5.25449101796 476% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 8.20758483034 24% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.367732287385 0.218282227539 168% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.151062507874 0.0743258471296 203% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.114865384145 0.0701772020484 164% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.177504556948 0.128457276422 138% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0957978794431 0.0628817314937 152% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 28.8 14.3799401198 200% => Automated_readability_index is high.
flesch_reading_ease: 13.28 48.3550499002 27% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 11.2 7.1628742515 156% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 23.6 12.197005988 193% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.75 12.5979740519 117% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.51 8.32208582834 114% => OK
difficult_words: 98.0 98.500998004 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 19.0 12.3882235529 153% => OK
gunning_fog: 21.6 11.1389221557 194% => OK
text_standard: 29.0 11.9071856287 244% => The average readability is very high. Good job!
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Maximum six paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.