The following appeared in a memo from a vice president of Quiot Manufacturing."During the past year, Quiot Manufacturing had 30 percent more on-the-job accidents than at the nearby Panoply Industries plant, where the work shifts are one hour shorter than

Accoding to the memo by the vice president of Quiot Manufactoring, he said last year's on-the-job accidents were 30% more than nearby plant, Panoply Industries, by the reason that their work shifts are one hours shorter than Quiot, thus the vic president suggests that they should reduce one working hour to reduce the on-the-job accidents, which also can increase productivity meanwhile in the author's opinion. While there are some factors still problematic, let's evaluate them carefully.

First of all, without further information by the author , the two plants , Quiot and Panoply cannot be compared together. We don't know what kinds of these factories are, thus their working courses may variy significantly.For example, Quiot is a car-making industry while Panoply Industries produces wires for electric plants. These are totally diffrerent enterprises which can not be put together to discuss.

Secondly, by the way of shortening working hours may not be the most proper measure to reduce the on-the-job accidents.Given the experts say that the most of these accidents are casused by lacking of sleep and fatigue, while whether it is the reason for the on-the-job accidents in Quiot Manufactoring is still in question because both the author and experts do not tell us. Maybe the wokers in this plant lack of right training and sufficent warning is the reason of the accidents. The vice president should make a wide survey to make clear what is the main reason of accidents in his plants.

Thirldy, Security do not promise the high productivity with out evidences.The vice president mentions us that by the way of reducing accidents in the factory, their productivtiy will increase. While there is no obvious factors can prove this kind of decreasing accidents will make the productivity increasing. On the contrary, there is a high possibility if the workers are more meticulous when they are at work, thus it will decrease the productivity by this concertration.
I suggest the vice president should figure out other idea ot enhance the working effectivity or prove us the relevance between the security and productivity in Quiot Manufactoring.

In conclusion, I fully comprehend the vice presidents' worrying, while he should make an ehaustive survey to find out the real reasons of on-the-job accidents and the necessity to compare with the other plants nearby. He also should make a clear attitude to the target of increasing the productivity of his plant and find the proper way to improve the working effectivity.

Votes
Average: 7.8 (3 votes)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 202, Rule ID: ONE_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use the numeral 'one' with plural words. Did you mean 'one hour', 'an hour', or simply 'hours'?
Suggestion: one hour; an hour; hours
...y the reason that their work shifts are one hours shorter than Quiot, thus the vic presid...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 395, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
... increase productivity meanwhile in the authors opinion. While there are some factors s...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 56, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...ithout further information by the author , the two plants , Quiot and Panoply cann...
^^
Line 3, column 73, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...formation by the author , the two plants , Quiot and Panoply cannot be compared to...
^^
Line 3, column 126, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...Panoply cannot be compared together. We dont know what kinds of these factories are,...
^^^^
Line 3, column 222, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: For
...working courses may variy significantly.For example, Quiot is a car-making industry...
^^^
Line 5, column 120, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Given
...sure to reduce the on-the-job accidents.Given the experts say that the most of these ...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 56, Rule ID: WITH_OUT[1]
Message: This word is usually written together. Did you mean 'without'?
Suggestion: without
...ty do not promise the high productivity with out evidences.The vice president mentions u...
^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 75, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: The
...he high productivity with out evidences.The vice president mentions us that by the ...
^^^
Line 7, column 194, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “While” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...tory, their productivtiy will increase. While there is no obvious factors can prove t...
^^^^^
Line 8, column 62, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[8]
Message: The proper name in singular (ot) must be used with a third-person verb: 'enhances'.
Suggestion: enhances
...esident should figure out other idea ot enhance the working effectivity or prove us the...
^^^^^^^
Line 10, column 299, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...he target of increasing the productivity of his plant and find the proper way to ...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, if, may, second, secondly, so, still, thus, while, for example, in conclusion, kind of, by the way, first of all, on the contrary

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 29.0 28.8173652695 101% => OK
Preposition: 54.0 55.5748502994 97% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 16.3942115768 30% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2133.0 2260.96107784 94% => OK
No of words: 407.0 441.139720559 92% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.24078624079 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49157444576 4.56307096286 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.95249661594 2.78398813304 106% => OK
Unique words: 205.0 204.123752495 100% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.503685503686 0.468620217663 107% => OK
syllable_count: 657.0 705.55239521 93% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 19.7664670659 71% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 29.0 22.8473053892 127% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 96.877289308 57.8364921388 168% => OK
Chars per sentence: 152.357142857 119.503703932 127% => OK
Words per sentence: 29.0714285714 23.324526521 125% => OK
Discourse Markers: 10.1428571429 5.70786347227 178% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 12.0 5.25449101796 228% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.283690074557 0.218282227539 130% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0860897619189 0.0743258471296 116% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.101446637234 0.0701772020484 145% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.148955067219 0.128457276422 116% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.109895772038 0.0628817314937 175% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.8 14.3799401198 124% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 42.04 48.3550499002 87% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.6 12.197005988 120% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.7 12.5979740519 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.57 8.32208582834 103% => OK
difficult_words: 90.0 98.500998004 91% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.6 11.1389221557 122% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 75.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 411 350
No. of Characters: 2077 1500
No. of Different Words: 196 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.503 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.054 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.776 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 149 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 119 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 81 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 58 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 29.357 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 16.052 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.714 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.355 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.613 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.181 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5