The following is a letter to the head of the tourism bureau on the island of Tria.
"Erosion of beach sand along the shores of Tria Island is a serious threat to our island and our tourist industry. In order to stop the erosion, we should charge people for using the beaches. Although this solution may annoy a few tourists in the short term, it will raise money for replenishing the sand. Replenishing the sand, as was done to protect buildings on the nearby island of Batia, will help protect buildings along our shores, thereby reducing these buildings' risk of additional damage from severe storms. And since beaches and buildings in the area will be preserved, Tria's tourist industry will improve over the long term."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
A letter to the head of tourism bureau, on the island of Tria, addressed the threat to tourism caused by the erosion of beach sand along the shores of Tria Island. The arguer has suggested a few measures that can be put in place to help the tourism industry on Tria Island over a long term. According to the arguer, there may be an initial resentment to the measures, by the tourists, but on a longer run, it will prove beneficial to Tria Island. The measures suggested by the arguer seem convincing on the first glance, although a close examination might unearth a few alternate possibilities that might undermine the arguer's position.
Firstly, the arguer suggests that the island of Tria should charge tourists who use the beach. According to him, it might annoy the tourists in the short term, but it will raise money to replenish the sand lost due to erosion. The arguer seems confident about such an approach, and that it will generate enough money to replenish the lost sand. The arguer fails to consider the possibility in which the number of tourists, visiting the island of Tria decreases and ultimately ceases. If such a situation occurs, due to the the tourist's displeasure of having to pay for using the beach, it may so happen that there would be not enough money collected to replenish the sand on the beaches of Tria, moreover they might even loose the tourists who visit Tria. Such a situation calls into question, the plausibility of the arguer's suggestion, regarding replenishment of sand on the beaches of Tria.
Secondly, the arguer has stated that replenishing the sand will help protect the buildings near the shores of Tria. The arguer bolsters his claim by citing similar measures taken by a nearby island Batia and the success they achieved with such an approach. The arguer fails to present the geographical similarities between the island of Batia and Tria. It might be the case that the buildings, in the island of Tria are not affected by the severe storms that it encounters. It might be possible that the buildings are susceptible to other forms of natural calamities. As a result, it might happen that replenishing that sand, on the beaches of Tria has not helped protect the buildings present along the shore of the island. Such a situation would affect the tourism in Tria and undermine the arguer's position.
Lastly, the arguer has stated that tourism on the island of Tria will improve over the long run. The arguer fails to quantify the term "long run". It might be the case that long run resembles ten-years or it might resemble fifty-years. If the later situation holds true, the island of Tria might face grave financial repercussions as a result of the loss in tourism, and it would take them a long time to recover from such a financial stress. If this situation comes into fruition, it will seriously affect the arguer's stand, regarding the new proposal.
In sum, the evidence provided by the arguer are erroneous and dubious. They do not bolster the arguer's position, rather they undermine the arguer's suggestion and call into question his reasoning behind such a proposal.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 536 350
No. of Characters: 2532 1500
No. of Different Words: 208 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.812 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.724 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.536 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 179 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 122 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 96 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 55 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.333 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.711 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.458 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.385 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.544 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.165 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 502, Rule ID: ON_FIRST_GLANCE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'at'?
Suggestion: at
...suggested by the arguer seem convincing on the first glance, although a close exam...
^^
Line 3, column 520, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: the
...ses. If such a situation occurs, due to the the tourists displeasure of having to pay f...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 520, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: the; the
...ses. If such a situation occurs, due to the the tourists displeasure of having to pay f...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 528, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'tourists'' or 'tourist's'?
Suggestion: tourists'; tourist's
...such a situation occurs, due to the the tourists displeasure of having to pay for using ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 819, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'arguers'' or 'arguer's'?
Suggestion: arguers'; arguer's
... into question, the plausibility of the arguers suggestion, regarding replenishment of ...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 140, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'arguers'' or 'arguer's'?
Suggestion: arguers'; arguer's
...ers position, rather they undermine the arguers suggestion and call into question his r...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, firstly, if, lastly, may, moreover, regarding, second, secondly, so, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 19.6327345309 46% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 23.0 12.9520958084 178% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 13.6137724551 118% => OK
Pronoun: 35.0 28.8173652695 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 76.0 55.5748502994 137% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2605.0 2260.96107784 115% => OK
No of words: 536.0 441.139720559 122% => OK
Chars per words: 4.86007462687 5.12650576532 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.81161862636 4.56307096286 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.61295222935 2.78398813304 94% => OK
Unique words: 223.0 204.123752495 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.416044776119 0.468620217663 89% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 773.1 705.55239521 110% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59920159681 88% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 4.96107784431 181% => OK
Article: 14.0 8.76447105788 160% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 9.0 4.22255489022 213% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 19.7664670659 121% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.8266472396 57.8364921388 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.541666667 119.503703932 91% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.3333333333 23.324526521 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.83333333333 5.70786347227 67% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 16.0 6.88822355289 232% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.67664670659 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.293679872068 0.218282227539 135% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.109207323623 0.0743258471296 147% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.124381893157 0.0701772020484 177% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.173881675405 0.128457276422 135% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.1118555051 0.0628817314937 178% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 14.3799401198 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 66.07 48.3550499002 137% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.197005988 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.2 12.5979740519 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.85 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 106.0 98.500998004 108% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 12.3882235529 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.