The following memo appeared in the newsletter of the West Meria Public Health Council An innovative treatment has come to our attention that promises to significantly reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces A study reports that in nearby East Mer

Essay topics:

The following memo appeared in the newsletter of the West Meria Public Health Council.
"An innovative treatment has come to our attention that promises to significantly reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces. A study reports that in nearby East Meria, where consumption of the plant beneficia is very high, people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. Clearly, eating a substantial amount of beneficia can prevent colds. Since colds are the reason most frequently given for absences from school and work, we recommend the daily use of nutritional supplements derived from beneficia. We predict this will dramatically reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces."

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.

In the memo, In order to reduce absenteeism from school and workplace, The West Meria Public Health Council concluded that the student and the working class people should consume nutritional element originated from beneficia. It comes to this conclusion based on a study report of nearby East Meria. As it stands now, the author's contention might prove valid, however, the author needs to provide three pieces of additional evidence in order to increase the persuasiveness of his argument.

First of all, the author assumes that the city of West Meria and East Meria are roughly the same. But this might not be the case. It is possible that citizens of the city of East Meria are more conscious about their health, hence, they maintain warm clothes when they go outside. These warm clothes keep them warm outside the home and thus helps them in fighting cold. It is also possible that there is Industrial area in West Meria where people are more exposed to hazards. Due to this exposure people's immune system is hampered and they can not fight agains cold. If either of the scenario is true, then the author's contention that people should consume beneficia is significantly flawed.

Moreover, the author presumes that the study was conducted in a scientific manner. But this might not be true. It is possible that the study was conducted in about a 10 years ago. Many things have changed in the past 10 years, but they are making the recommendation based on this past study. It is also possible that people who were doing the study did not take a good sample. This people may have visited a small town and took sample from that town made the report based on this data for the entire city. If the scenario mentioned above is true, the author's recommendation that people should consume beneficia doesn't hold water.

Finally, the author assumes that no other factor other than benefia are responsible for the prevention of the cold. But this might not be the case. It is possible that people of the East Meria were eating other medicine alongside with beneficia which worked against cold and this medicine reduced the number of affected people. It is also possible that people of East Meria kept their house warm by lighting the fire and thus kept their body warm which helped them fighting against cold. If either of the scenario mentioned above is true, then the author's contention is significantly weakened.

In conclusion, the author might be correct in recommending daily use of supplement originated from beneficia. However, as it stands now, the authors contention is based on three unwarranted assumptions which significantly hinders the assertions credibility. If the author is able to provide answer to these above mentioned questions, it will increases the persuasiveness of his argument.

Votes
Average: 6 (2 votes)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 323, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...earby East Meria. As it stands now, the authors contention might prove valid, however, ...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 611, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...ither of the scenario is true, then the authors contention that people should consume b...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 60, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a scientific manner" with adverb for "scientific"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...r presumes that the study was conducted in a scientific manner. But this might not be true. It is poss...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 552, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...e scenario mentioned above is true, the authors recommendation that people should consu...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 612, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...on that people should consume beneficia doesnt hold water. Finally, the author ass...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 466, Rule ID: ADVISE_VBG[9]
Message: The verb 'help' is used with infinitive: 'to fight' or 'fight'.
Suggestion: to fight; fight
... kept their body warm which helped them fighting against cold. If either of the scenario...
^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 549, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...nario mentioned above is true, then the authors contention is significantly weakened. ...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 142, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...neficia. However, as it stands now, the authors contention is based on three unwarrante...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 235, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'assertions'' or 'assertion's'?
Suggestion: assertions'; assertion's
...mptions which significantly hinders the assertions credibility. If the author is able to p...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 334, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...swer to these above mentioned questions, it will increases the persuasiveness of ...
^^
Line 9, column 344, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: 'increase'
Suggestion: increase
...ese above mentioned questions, it will increases the persuasiveness of his argument.
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, hence, however, if, may, moreover, so, then, thus, in conclusion, first of all

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 19.0 13.6137724551 140% => OK
Pronoun: 46.0 28.8173652695 160% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 55.0 55.5748502994 99% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 16.3942115768 73% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2341.0 2260.96107784 104% => OK
No of words: 470.0 441.139720559 107% => OK
Chars per words: 4.98085106383 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.65612321451 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.56633231798 2.78398813304 92% => OK
Unique words: 207.0 204.123752495 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.440425531915 0.468620217663 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 722.7 705.55239521 102% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 4.96107784431 222% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 19.7664670659 126% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.8473053892 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 47.1959998305 57.8364921388 82% => OK
Chars per sentence: 93.64 119.503703932 78% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.8 23.324526521 81% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.2 5.70786347227 74% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 11.0 5.25449101796 209% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.67664670659 235% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.128405847463 0.218282227539 59% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.039612018486 0.0743258471296 53% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0609154360517 0.0701772020484 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0839212892458 0.128457276422 65% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0737642817605 0.0628817314937 117% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.4 14.3799401198 79% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 48.3550499002 128% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.197005988 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.6 12.5979740519 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.69 8.32208582834 92% => OK
difficult_words: 94.0 98.500998004 95% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.1389221557 83% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 25 15
No. of Words: 471 350
No. of Characters: 2285 1500
No. of Different Words: 206 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.659 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.851 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.531 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 152 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 105 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 75 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 44 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.84 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.984 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.8 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.308 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.478 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.07 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5