The following memo appeared in the newsletter of the West Meria Public Health Council.
"An innovative treatment has come to our attention that promises to significantly reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces. A study reports that in nearby East Meria, where fish consumption is very high, people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. This shows that eating a substantial amount of fish can clearly prevent colds. Furthermore, since colds are the reason most frequently given for absences from school and work, attendance levels will improve. Therefore, we recommend the daily use of a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil as a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The statement states that a memo has been appeared in the newsletter of the West Meria which states that the absenteeism in the schools and workplaces has to be reduced. As citizens of East Meria tend to consume more fish due to which their people do not catch cold frequently, therefore, same methodology of consuming higher fish should be opted by the population of the West Meria. Moreover, the cases of cold are more frequently given as the reasons for absences from school and workplaces in West Meria, therefore, consuming products with fish oil might increase the attendance. The statement provided by the author in the arguement has tried to provide the enough information so that an answer should be obtain but there are no enough facts and numbers to support the statement. Hence, number of assumptions can be easily drawn from the statement which are presented in the essay.
Firstly, the author has only mentioned about the high consumption of fish in the East Meria. There is no exact comparison in the number or percentages of the fish consumed in both of the states. It might be possible that due to higher population people of East Meria consume higher amounts of fish then West Meria people. It might be a possibilty that workout routine of people of East Meria is better than West Meria due to their immunity levels are higher and do not catch cold easily. Other significant factors are not discussed by the author that could lead to the more specific answer.
Secondly, the other reasons for absenteeism besides cold are not discussed in the argument by the author. Proper numbers should be provided so that the conclusion could be easily drawn. For instance, it might be a possibilty that 55 percent of the absences are due to the cold and the other 45 percent accounts for other illness, this can falsified the memo. There's also a possibility that 90 percent absences are due to cold then the statement might be easilty summarized. But due to the absense of no numeric data can lead to the confusion in arriving at the conclusion of the statement.
Thirdly, it might be possible that in East Meria cold might not be a prominent reason for the absence of the people from school and workplaces, then other diseases should be the reason for it. Therefore, there are no proper grounds for the comparison between the two cities as they can differ in population, climatic conditions, eating habits of the people and so on.
Lastly, as data given in the statement can be easily fabricated without no proper numeric information until then no conclusion can be made whether by increasing the content of fish oil in the daily habits can lead to the decline in the number of absenteeism from West Meria.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 470 350
No. of Characters: 2207 1500
No. of Different Words: 177 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.656 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.696 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.522 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 155 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 107 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 74 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 52 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.111 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.189 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.778 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.37 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.569 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.125 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 710, Rule ID: SHOULD_BE_DO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'obtained'?
Suggestion: obtained
...information so that an answer should be obtain but there are no enough facts and numbe...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 360, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: There's
...r illness, this can falsified the memo. Theres also a possibility that 90 percent abse...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, first, firstly, hence, if, lastly, moreover, second, secondly, so, then, therefore, third, thirdly, as to, for instance
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 27.0 19.6327345309 138% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 20.0 12.9520958084 154% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 19.0 28.8173652695 66% => OK
Preposition: 65.0 55.5748502994 117% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 16.3942115768 110% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2256.0 2260.96107784 100% => OK
No of words: 470.0 441.139720559 107% => OK
Chars per words: 4.8 5.12650576532 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.65612321451 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.59715692312 2.78398813304 93% => OK
Unique words: 182.0 204.123752495 89% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.387234042553 0.468620217663 83% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 695.7 705.55239521 99% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.22255489022 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 22.8473053892 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 51.741045626 57.8364921388 89% => OK
Chars per sentence: 125.333333333 119.503703932 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.1111111111 23.324526521 112% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.72222222222 5.70786347227 135% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.109593746774 0.218282227539 50% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0450772038014 0.0743258471296 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0539567346867 0.0701772020484 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0688805944374 0.128457276422 54% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0461438002628 0.0628817314937 73% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.2 14.3799401198 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 53.55 48.3550499002 111% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.197005988 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.86 12.5979740519 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.29 8.32208582834 100% => OK
difficult_words: 100.0 98.500998004 102% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 17.5 12.3882235529 141% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.1389221557 111% => OK
text_standard: 18.0 11.9071856287 151% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.