The following was written by a group of developers in the city of Monroe."A jazz music club in Monroe would be a tremendously profitable enterprise. At present, the nearest jazz club is over 60 miles away from Monroe; thus, our proposed club, the C N

Essay topics:

The following was written by a group of developers in the city of Monroe.
"A jazz music club in Monroe would be a tremendously profitable enterprise. At present, the nearest jazz club is over 60 miles away from Monroe; thus, our proposed club, the C Note, would have the local market all to itself. In addition, there is ample evidence of the popularity of jazz in Monroe: over 100,000 people attended Monroe's jazz festival last summer, several well-known jazz musicians live in Monroe, and the highest-rated radio program in Monroe is 'Jazz Nightly.' Finally, a nationwide study indicates that the typical jazz fan spends close to $1,000 per year on jazz entertainment. We therefore predict that the C Note cannot help but make money."

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the prediction and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the prediction.

According to the group of developers in the prompt, A jazz club in the city of Monroe will be very profitable. However, the group based their conclusion on some assumptions, if not true, will drastically reduce effectiveness of their prediction. To understand and evaluate their prediction, they need to answer three questions related to their assumptions.

First of all, the group presumes that their proposed club C Note will have the market all to itself because the nearest jazz club is over 60 miles away. However, this may not be the case. We need an answer to this question -- Who are the main customer of the local market? If the answer is that, the local market mostly comprises of local and dilettante jazz enthusiasts, who if possible will not travel 60 miles to attend a jazz club, then the group of developers argument is valid. But, if the local jazz market consists of mainly rich and highly educated jazz enthusiasts who have the means of easy travel, they may not simply attend a local new jazz club just because it is near. Rather, they would choose quality. If the local market mostly comprises of the later type customers, then the group of developers prediction will become very unpersuasive.

Second of all, the group presumes that jazz is popular in Monroe based on the evidence that over 100,000 people attended Monroe's jazz festival last summer, several well known jazz musicians live in Monroe and the highest-rated radio program in Monroe is 'Jazz Nightly'. But this presumption may not hold water without answering the following questions -- where do the people who attended the jazz festival live? do the jazz musicians live in Monroe because of jazz's popularity? who are the primary audience of radio programs in Monroe? If these questions have answers like: the people who attended the summer festival do not live in Monroe, they went to Monroe to attend the festival, the jazz musicians are living in Monroe to take a break from their fans and live in the place where they can get some peace of mind away from popular media, and the primary audience of the main audience of radio programs in Monroe are the few jazz fans, then, the group of developers prediction seems unfounded at best, and specious at worst.

Lastly, the developers assume that the jazz fans in Monroe will spend a lot of money on jazz entertainment bases on the evidence provided by a national study. To evaluate this claim we need answer for the following question -- who were the main participants of the study? If the participants of the study were wealthy jazz enthusiasts who can afford to spend around $1000 on jazz per year, and the people of Monroe are not that enthusiastic or are not that solvent, then the developers' prediction does not hold water.

In conclusion, it is possible that opening a jazz club at Monroe will be profitable just like the developers' prediction. However, as it stands now, the argument relies on unfounded assumptions that beg at least three questions. Thus the developers need to provide additional evidence on those three fronts: who are the main customers in the local jazz market? is jazz really popular in Monroe? who were the primary participants of the study?

Votes
Average: 8.2 (3 votes)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 321, Rule ID: COMPRISES_OF[1]
Message: Did you mean 'comprises' or 'consists of'?
Suggestion: comprises; consists of
...answer is that, the local market mostly comprises of local and dilettante jazz enthusiasts, ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 373, Rule ID: WHO_NOUN[1]
Message: A noun should not follow "who". Try changing to a verb or maybe to 'who is a if'.
Suggestion: who is a if
... local and dilettante jazz enthusiasts, who if possible will not travel 60 miles to at...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 377, Rule ID: IF_IS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'is'?
Suggestion: is
...al and dilettante jazz enthusiasts, who if possible will not travel 60 miles to at...
^^
Line 3, column 747, Rule ID: COMPRISES_OF[1]
Message: Did you mean 'comprises' or 'consists of'?
Suggestion: comprises; consists of
...ose quality. If the local market mostly comprises of the later type customers, then the grou...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 411, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Do
...le who attended the jazz festival live? do the jazz musicians live in Monroe becau...
^^
Line 5, column 477, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Who
... in Monroe because of jazzs popularity? who are the primary audience of radio progr...
^^^
Line 8, column 474, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'developers'' or 'developer's'?
Suggestion: developers'; developer's
...astic or are not that solvent, then the developers prediction does not hold water. In...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 99, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'developers'' or 'developer's'?
Suggestion: developers'; developer's
...Monroe will be profitable just like the developers prediction. However, as it stands now, ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 229, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...ions that beg at least three questions. Thus the developers need to provide addition...
^^^^
Line 11, column 361, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Is
...ain customers in the local jazz market? is jazz really popular in Monroe? who were...
^^
Line 11, column 395, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Who
...rket? is jazz really popular in Monroe? who were the primary participants of the st...
^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, lastly, may, really, second, so, then, thus, well, at least, in conclusion, first of all

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.6327345309 107% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 12.9520958084 131% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 21.0 13.6137724551 154% => OK
Pronoun: 32.0 28.8173652695 111% => OK
Preposition: 72.0 55.5748502994 130% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 16.3942115768 110% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2667.0 2260.96107784 118% => OK
No of words: 547.0 441.139720559 124% => OK
Chars per words: 4.87568555759 5.12650576532 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.83611736076 4.56307096286 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.59359732947 2.78398813304 93% => OK
Unique words: 220.0 204.123752495 108% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.402193784278 0.468620217663 86% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 810.0 705.55239521 115% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 2.70958083832 258% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 98.0660824227 57.8364921388 170% => OK
Chars per sentence: 115.956521739 119.503703932 97% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.7826086957 23.324526521 102% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.91304347826 5.70786347227 86% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 11.0 5.25449101796 209% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.67664670659 214% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.325470208592 0.218282227539 149% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.105289773389 0.0743258471296 142% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0939475129469 0.0701772020484 134% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.183682291673 0.128457276422 143% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0472629777321 0.0628817314937 75% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.4 14.3799401198 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 48.3550499002 117% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.32 12.5979740519 90% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.29 8.32208582834 88% => OK
difficult_words: 87.0 98.500998004 88% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 547 350
No. of Characters: 2591 1500
No. of Different Words: 199 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.836 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.737 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.517 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 170 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 113 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 88 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 55 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 28.789 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 18.274 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.737 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.368 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.586 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.152 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5