"In a recent study more than 5,000 adolescents were asked how often they ate meals with their families. Almost 30 percent of the teens said they ate at least seven meals per week with their families. Furthermore, according to the same survey, teens who reported having the most family meals per week were also the ones least likely to have tried illegal drugs, tobacco, and alcohol. Family meals were also associated with lower rates of problems such as low grades in school, low self-esteem, and depression. We therefore recommend that families have as many meals together as possible. We predict that doing so will greatly benefit adolescents and turn troubled teens away from bad behaviors."
The author recommends that families have as many meals together as possible, and he predicts that doing so will benefit adolescents and turn troubled teens away from bad behaviours. To support the conclusion, he cites various evidences. Although these evidences appear to bolster the argument, a meticulous analysis will show otherwise. Hence, in order to have the predicted result, the author needs to cite the following specific evidences.
First of all, the author's statistics are vague. Suppose the statistics were a little bit higher than five thousand. Then the author's presumption becomes these statistics represent the adolescent of the society as a whole. It is possible that in a group of other adolescent society, the condition is very different. For example, analysing the data of just six thousand, we cannot say that the situation is the same as a whole. So the recommendation based on this assumption doesn't hold water.
Second of all, the author has not provided the name of a particular place where the survey of adolescents were conducted. Perhaps the study was conducted in a city. Even if the survey was conducted in a total adolescent's population of the city, it is possible that the situation in even in a nearby villige is very distinct. For example, it is not necessarily same situation of adolescents in California as in nearby villages. Hence, the author's evidence is unwarranted.
Thirdly, the author assumes that family meals plays an important role in adolescent's academic grades, self esteem, and mental health as well. However, he has not cited any scientific evidences to support this statement. Possibly, this is just a author's viewpoint. Perhaps the family meals were not associated with these factores. In such case the author's prediction fails.
Hence, in conclusion, without these specific evidences, I cannot agree with the author's prediction of family meals will greatly benefit adolescents and turn troubled teens away from bad behaviours.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 318 350
No. of Characters: 1625 1500
No. of Different Words: 165 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.223 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.11 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.807 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 120 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 98 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 78 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 50 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.143 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.363 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.619 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.297 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.504 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.095 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 433, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...to cite the following specific evidences First of all the authors statistics are ...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 18, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...specific evidences First of all the authors statistics are vague Suppose the statis...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 77, Rule ID: LITTLE_BIT[1]
Message: Reduce redundancy by using 'little' or 'bit'.
Suggestion: little; bit
...are vague Suppose the statistics were a little bit higher than five thousand Then the auth...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 123, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
... bit higher than five thousand Then the authors presumption becomes these statistics re...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 465, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...recommendation based on this assumption doesnt hold water Second of all the author...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 482, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...sed on this assumption doesnt hold water Second of all the author has not provide...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 207, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'adolescents'' or 'adolescent's'?
Suggestion: adolescents'; adolescent's
... if the survey was conducted in a total adolescents population of the city it is possible t...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 359, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...t For example it is not necessarily same situation of adolescents in California a...
^^
Line 7, column 237, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...rt this statement Possibly this is just a authors viewpoint Perhaps the family me...
^
Line 7, column 239, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
... this statement Possibly this is just a authors viewpoint Perhaps the family meals were...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 339, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...ed with these factores In such case the authors prediction fails Hence in conclusio...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 363, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...n such case the authors prediction fails Hence in conclusion without these specif...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
...h case the authors prediction fails Hence in conclusion without these specific ev...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 78, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...cific evidences I cannot agree with the authors prediction of family meals will greatly...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, hence, however, if, second, so, then, third, thirdly, well, for example, in conclusion, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.6327345309 71% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 12.9520958084 39% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 11.1786427146 36% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 21.0 28.8173652695 73% => OK
Preposition: 33.0 55.5748502994 59% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 13.0 16.3942115768 79% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1633.0 2260.96107784 72% => OK
No of words: 317.0 441.139720559 72% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.15141955836 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.21953715646 4.56307096286 92% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77140065038 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 157.0 204.123752495 77% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.495268138801 0.468620217663 106% => OK
syllable_count: 528.3 705.55239521 75% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 0.0 4.96107784431 0% => OK
Article: 1.0 8.76447105788 11% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.22255489022 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 1.0 19.7664670659 5% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 317.0 22.8473053892 1387% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 0.0 57.8364921388 0% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 1633.0 119.503703932 1366% => Less chars_per_sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 317.0 23.324526521 1359% => Less words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 107.0 5.70786347227 1875% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 14.0 5.25449101796 266% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 0.0 8.20758483034 0% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 6.88822355289 15% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.67664670659 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.141968268015 0.218282227539 65% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.141968268015 0.0743258471296 191% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0701772020484 0% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0904494230289 0.128457276422 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0392094261621 0.0628817314937 62% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 161.3 14.3799401198 1122% => Automated_readability_index is high.
flesch_reading_ease: -258.74 48.3550499002 -535% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 0.0 7.1628742515 0% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 128.1 12.197005988 1050% => Flesch kincaid grade is high.
coleman_liau_index: 14.07 12.5979740519 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 22.85 8.32208582834 275% => Dale chall readability score is high.
difficult_words: 70.0 98.500998004 71% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 58.0 12.3882235529 468% => Linsear_write_formula is high.
gunning_fog: 128.8 11.1389221557 1156% => Gunning_fog is high.
text_standard: 129.0 11.9071856287 1083% => The average readability is very high. Good job!
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.