A recently issued twenty-year study on headaches suffered by the residents of Mentia investigated the possible therapeutic effect of consuming salicylates. Salicylates are members of the same chemical family as aspirin, a medicine used to treat headaches.

Essay topics:

A recently issued twenty-year study on headaches suffered by the residents of Mentia investigated the possible therapeutic effect of consuming salicylates. Salicylates are members of the same chemical family as aspirin, a medicine used to treat headaches. Although many foods are naturally rich in salicylates, food-processing companies also add salicylates to foods as preservatives. The twenty-year study found a correlation between the rise in the commercial use of salicylates and a steady decline in the average number of headaches reported by study participants. At the time when the study concluded, food-processing companies had just discovered that salicylates can also be used as flavor additives for foods, and, as a result, many companies plan to do so. Based on these study results, some health experts predict that residents of Mentia will suffer even fewer headaches in the future.

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the prediction and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the prediction.

The note according to a research conducted about the effect of salicylates as a painkiller in citizens of Mentia for the last twenty years, concluded that the extra usage of this substance as flavor in the food industry will cause to the reduction of the headache in Mentia. This result and prediction cannot be accepted as it stands since it relies on the series of assumptions and pieces of evidence which are questionable. Therefore, for verification of this prediction, the author should responses a list of questions which will be discussed in the following paragraphs.

This first question which comes to mind is, does salicylates and aspirin own the same property for treatment? Since sharing an identical family cannot solidify the possession of similar nature from two materials. Indeed, the same molecules for the sake of the various structure of the atomic organization illustrate the different feature. Therefore, this prolong study which takes twenty years should present more cogent evidence about the effectiveness of salicylates as the therapeutic instead of the vague prediction about its possibility merely for sharing the identical family with the aspirin.

Another major problem in the note which highlights a list of inquiry is the scope and reliability of the conducted research. As surmised in the note, the study finds a link between the increment of commercial usage of salicylates as preservatives and the number of the reported headaches by the studied population. While this hypothesis in the first glance seems logic and reliable; however, it is skeptical and raises questions such as do these considered population for study consume these preserved foods by salicylates? Do these people take an extra treatment for their headaches, or the consumption of these foods is the main reason for the decrement of pain? Since there is no lucid clue about the diet and lifestyle of these case studies, it is hard to substantiate the validity of its finding. Besides, even accuracy of research was undoubtful, the generalization of finding to the entire population of Mentia is not acceptable and causes this question that does this considered group completely represent the entire population in Mentia? Since factors such as the gender, age, lifestyle, genetic background, and living condition are vital parameters which lead to the variation of the health status of people, and the considered sample group for study should indicate the whole denizens health status according to these parameters.

Finally, at the end of the note there is a surmise that by the additive implementation of salicylates as flavor in foods, the number of people in Mentia who suffer the headache will be decreased. This assumption actually underestimated some crux and substantial concerns and can be accepted if responses to some questions about the health boundary for intake number of salicylates and inclusion of this added amount in this boundary. In fact, the writer should answer, what is the standard level of intake salicylates to not threaten the people live? Because of the consumption of materials as overdose is dangerous for people health. Furthermore, does this addition usage of salicylates as flavor fit in this limit or not? Otherwise, this assumption cannot be accorded.

To wrap it up, all the aforementioned questions depict the shakiness of this note which requires further explanation for its verification.

Votes
Average: 2.9 (3 votes)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 110, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Since” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...in own the same property for treatment? Since sharing an identical family cannot soli...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 1288, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'denizens'' or 'denizen's'?
Suggestion: denizens'; denizen's
...oup for study should indicate the whole denizens health status according to these parame...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 139, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...rther explanation for its verification.
^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, besides, finally, first, furthermore, however, if, so, therefore, while, in fact, such as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 11.1786427146 143% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 28.8173652695 115% => OK
Preposition: 78.0 55.5748502994 140% => OK
Nominalization: 30.0 16.3942115768 183% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2890.0 2260.96107784 128% => OK
No of words: 546.0 441.139720559 124% => OK
Chars per words: 5.29304029304 5.12650576532 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.83390555256 4.56307096286 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.97326032146 2.78398813304 107% => OK
Unique words: 265.0 204.123752495 130% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.485347985348 0.468620217663 104% => OK
syllable_count: 924.3 705.55239521 131% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 22.8473053892 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 66.9678570476 57.8364921388 116% => OK
Chars per sentence: 137.619047619 119.503703932 115% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.0 23.324526521 111% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.71428571429 5.70786347227 83% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.141446892242 0.218282227539 65% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.043627488249 0.0743258471296 59% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0553746472491 0.0701772020484 79% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0799384166196 0.128457276422 62% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.052710967939 0.0628817314937 84% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.5 14.3799401198 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 36.63 48.3550499002 76% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.1628742515 156% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.6 12.197005988 120% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.7 12.5979740519 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.35 8.32208582834 112% => OK
difficult_words: 153.0 98.500998004 155% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.1389221557 111% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

argument 1 -- not OK. need to argue:

The twenty-year study found a correlation between the rise in the commercial use of salicylates and a steady decline in the average number of headaches reported by study participants.

//maybe there are other reasons caused the decline

argument 2 -- not exactly. need to argue:

At the time when the study concluded, food-processing companies had just discovered that salicylates can also be used as flavor additives for foods, and, as a result, many companies plan to do so.

//it is not 'the more, the better'

argument 3 -- not really. need to argue:

Based on these study results, some health experts predict that residents of Mentia will suffer even fewer headaches in the future.

//suppose it can cure headaches , while it doesn't mean it can prevent headaches .

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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: ??? out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 546 350
No. of Characters: 2834 1500
No. of Different Words: 250 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.834 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.19 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.899 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 217 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 156 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 129 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 96 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.601 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.476 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.291 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.499 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.043 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5