The vice president of human resources at Climpson Industries sent the following recommendation to the company's president."In an effort to improve our employees' productivity, we should implement electronic monitoring of employees' Int

Essay topics:

The vice president of human resources at Climpson Industries sent the following recommendation to the company's president.

"In an effort to improve our employees' productivity, we should implement electronic monitoring of employees' Internet use from their workstations. Employees who use the Internet from their workstations need to be identified and punished if we are to reduce the number of work hours spent on personal or recreational activities, such as shopping or playing games. By installing software to detect employees' Internet use on company computers, we can prevent employees from wasting time, foster a better work ethic at Climpson, and improve our overall profits."

Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.

In the context, the author concludes that the company should install internet monitoring software to every computer of the office to detect whether employees are using internet or not. According to his thought, this will haste good work etiquete & augment the companie's overall profit. However, careful scrutiny view reveals that there are copius amount of loopholes laying among the thought of the author which he provided to justify his conclusion. Therefore, the argument can be considered unpersuasive & need more tranchant analysis.

First of all, the author merely decided to monitor employees computers without thinking the fact this will be stymie for the workers privacy. It might be happened that many workers will not wlecome it with much alacrity rather take it like a hobble of thier privacy. Beside this, it might be caused that the workers are using internet for companie's use. For example, a new fresher worker do not know some term which the company is using, so he can google it for finding out the meaning. This is not a use for recreational activity rather it is a using for the companie's benifit.

Additionally. the author is suggesitng to punish the workers for using internet & want to reduce recreational activity. Though this is a decision for companie's profit, this can affect counterwise. For instance, the quality of work can be degraded if the break time entertainment is curtailed. Workers might feel too much banal & this will affect thier work. Moreover, if the company want to monitor the internet use just by a software that will not be impactful . Because the employees can use internet on thier mobile phone. Hence, this evidence for the author conclusion is also languid.

FInally, If the author would provide some survey data that how many people are using internet during office time for entertainment purpose then it will be helpful to jusficate the argument. Furthermore, The company can fixed some fixed website for use which can be needed for working for the companie's purpose. This will helpful to the company. Besides this, CC tv should be installed to check up the workstation enviroment. This will help to identify who are using internet on mobile on the working hours. By conducting such methods the argument can be stregthen in favor of author' viewpoint.

In summary, the argument is unsubstantiated as it stands with such porosity. To bolster it further, the author must need to provide some concrete evidence perhaps by giving some survey data result of people who are using internet on working hours or by implicating some CCtv to monitor the workers activity.

Votes
Average: 2.5 (3 votes)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 348, Rule ID: THERE_RE_MANY[3]
Message: Possible agreement error. Did you mean 'amounts'?
Suggestion: amounts
...tiny view reveals that there are copius amount of loopholes laying among the thought o...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 126, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'workers'' or 'worker's'?
Suggestion: workers'; worker's
...ng the fact this will be stymie for the workers privacy. It might be happened that many...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 201, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ed that many workers will not wlecome it with much alacrity rather take it like a...
^^
Line 5, column 417, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...esher worker do not know some term which the company is using, so he can google i...
^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Additionally,
... using for the companies benifit. Additionally. the author is suggesitng to punish the...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 15, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
... companies benifit. Additionally. the author is suggesitng to punish the work...
^^^
Line 9, column 254, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e quality of work can be degraded if the break time entertainment is curtailed. W...
^^
Line 9, column 425, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...want to monitor the internet use just by a software that will not be impactful . ...
^^
Line 9, column 464, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...y a software that will not be impactful . Because the employees can use internet ...
^^
Line 9, column 467, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Because” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...a software that will not be impactful . Because the employees can use internet on thier...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 49, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... If the author would provide some survey data that how many people are using inte...
^^
Line 13, column 577, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...he argument can be stregthen in favor of author viewpoint. In summary, the ...
^^
Line 17, column 137, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...er, the author must need to provide some concrete evidence perhaps by giving some...
^^
Line 17, column 292, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'workers'' or 'worker's'?
Suggestion: workers'; worker's
...by implicating some CCtv to monitor the workers activity.
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, finally, first, furthermore, hence, however, if, moreover, so, then, therefore, for example, for instance, in summary, first of all

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 19.6327345309 122% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 25.0 12.9520958084 193% => OK
Conjunction : 2.0 11.1786427146 18% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 30.0 28.8173652695 104% => OK
Preposition: 44.0 55.5748502994 79% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 16.3942115768 73% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2198.0 2260.96107784 97% => OK
No of words: 430.0 441.139720559 97% => OK
Chars per words: 5.11162790698 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55372829156 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.66048033912 2.78398813304 96% => OK
Unique words: 206.0 204.123752495 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.479069767442 0.468620217663 102% => OK
syllable_count: 689.4 705.55239521 98% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 19.7664670659 121% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 45.7510625256 57.8364921388 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.5833333333 119.503703932 77% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.9166666667 23.324526521 77% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.08333333333 5.70786347227 107% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 14.0 5.25449101796 266% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.67664670659 235% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0499055398957 0.218282227539 23% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0191685214709 0.0743258471296 26% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.025973374486 0.0701772020484 37% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0355294485487 0.128457276422 28% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0176758735125 0.0628817314937 28% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.6 14.3799401198 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 48.3550499002 112% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.06 12.5979740519 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.37 8.32208582834 101% => OK
difficult_words: 106.0 98.500998004 108% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.

Rates: 16.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: ??? out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 00 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 430 350
No. of Characters: 2133 1500
No. of Different Words: 200 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.554 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.96 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.568 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 171 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 128 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 73 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 38 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.917 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.719 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.458 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.296 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.478 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.069 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5