Competition for high grades seriously limits the quality of learning at all levels of education.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
Modern education could be mainly classified into three groups. There is the essential education which has elementary school education and middle school education, the advanced education which contains high school education and university education and for-scholar education which is graduated school education. All three categories of education estimate students by giving different points based on their achievement and encourage students to work harder by comparing with one another. Although there would be some side effects of this method, however I generally agree that it doesn’t harm the quality of learning.
The proponents of the statement contend that the competition for high grades contaminate the purpose of learning from self-esteem to getting the better point and make student be myopic. The purpose would become the purpose for the purpose. This opinion might be true when the paper that determines the grade is mainly based on memorizing as much information as a student can or solving simple but many questions in short time. For example, when the Korean students tried to go to university, they should take Korean SAT which 90% of the questions is one-from-five type on a limited time. Because the questions are easy, about 0.5% of students who took the test gets a perfect score. Just by missing a single question by mistake, the student could not go to where he wanted and take a test next year.
However, the problem that the proponents of the statement is saying is on very circumscribed occasions. If the quality of the estimation is not approved enough, it is certain that the result of the estimation won’t bring the arose from the students’ heart about the purpose of the education. When the quality of the education could be accepted by the third perspective, being competitive for high grades would bring positive feedback, giving students a reason why they should work harder. One of the exemplars that I suggest for better way of estimation is group presentation. When I was at high school, one of the biology classes that I attend used student-made presentation as the teaching product. Each time when the teacher got a lecture from the group of students, he remarked about how the group was good and bad. From his comments, other students understand biology more deeply, sometimes about things that the textbook never presents. When I started making my presentation, I searched about the topic that I would discuss as profound as possible for higher grade. As I searched and tried my best to explain to other students, I could understand it better than when I just reach the text. Though my ostensible purpose was higher grade, I made my personal academic accomplishment.
I think the statement is right only on limited conditions. If the way how the students get points is good enough, competition will guarantee the quality of education.
Grammar and spelling errors:
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Suggestion:
...apos;t harm the quality of learning. The proponents of the statement contend ...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...he wanted and take a test next year. However, the problem that the proponents...
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Line 11, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...my personal academic accomplishment. I think the statement is right only on l...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, so, third, for example, i think, in short
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.5258426966 108% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.4196629213 105% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 14.8657303371 67% => OK
Relative clauses : 22.0 11.3162921348 194% => OK
Pronoun: 36.0 33.0505617978 109% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 58.6224719101 82% => OK
Nominalization: 28.0 12.9106741573 217% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2431.0 2235.4752809 109% => OK
No of words: 472.0 442.535393258 107% => OK
Chars per words: 5.15042372881 5.05705443957 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.6610686524 4.55969084622 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.83704636067 2.79657885939 101% => OK
Unique words: 235.0 215.323595506 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.497881355932 0.4932671777 101% => OK
syllable_count: 738.9 704.065955056 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 6.24550561798 128% => OK
Article: 5.0 4.99550561798 100% => OK
Subordination: 10.0 3.10617977528 322% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.77640449438 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.38483146067 46% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.2370786517 109% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 23.0359550562 91% => OK
Sentence length SD: 49.4481321042 60.3974514979 82% => OK
Chars per sentence: 110.5 118.986275619 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.4545454545 23.4991977007 91% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.68181818182 5.21951772744 51% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 7.80617977528 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 10.2758426966 88% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 5.13820224719 136% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.83258426966 124% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.179369042217 0.243740707755 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0500304426812 0.0831039109588 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.042573236863 0.0758088955206 56% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.110391893328 0.150359130593 73% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0065669606701 0.0667264976115 10% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.6 14.1392134831 96% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 48.8420337079 103% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.1743820225 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.59 12.1639044944 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.12 8.38706741573 97% => OK
difficult_words: 103.0 100.480337079 103% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 11.8971910112 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.2143820225 93% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.7820224719 110% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.