ISSUE 9
In any field of endeavor, it is impossible to make a significant contribution without first being strongly influenced by past achievements within that field.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
The author asserts that new contributions are grounding in past achievements. Admittedly, the values past achievements embody might not be synchronized with newly emerging needs and desires of people. However, contributions of past works influence new works in implicit and indirect way I think that new significant contributions are always influenced by past works even though the value structures of both are different.
Past achievements might entail outdated values that are not necessarily advantageous in the current context because what people value and care changes as time goes by. For example, a smart phone, totally different from the previous from of phone, is invented in the new technological context around 20s. Before smart phones, People used to bring folder phones whose only functions are making calls and sending text-messages. In fact, the researches and developmental know-hows of old version of phones became useless in this new context, since the main focus of new smart phones is the connectability to internet that can never be found in the previous context. The past works and efforts made on the old version of phone might seem to be irrelevant to the new invention of smart phone, as they had nothing to do with internet.
However, past achievements have indirect contributions on new achievements even when the embodied value differs from the new one. If the previous example mentioned above is examined thoroughly, it can be found that technological knowledge on previous phone models that investigated the way to shrink the entire size of the phone paved a way to the development of current phone’s internet usage. Even though the shrinking technology did not directly contribute to the main feature of smartphone, providing internet service, it can indirectly help this new development in a way that they enabled increased size of a screen so that people can browse internet with their phone more conveniently. In fact, knowledge has been accumulated in a collective way and have lots of potentials that can bring unexpected contributions. We can find another example in physics. One of greatest scientific achievements in modern history, Einstein’ theory of relativity is also based on the Newton’s law of gravity.. Although the relative theory revealed that the Newton’s previous achievement had some flaws, this would not exist at all if there were not Newton's past work.
It seems true that, values of past achievements might be outdated and does not make noticeable impacts on new contributions. Nevertheless, the knowledge built in the past achievements influenced new inventions in indirect or implicit ways. In conclusion, I agree with the statement in that any knowledge established in the past days can bring unexpected values.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 334, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...k that new significant contributions are always influenced by past works even tho...
^^
Line 2, column 550, Rule ID: MAIN_FOCUS[1]
Message: Use simply 'focus'.
Suggestion: focus
... useless in this new context, since the main focus of new smart phones is the connectabili...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 760, Rule ID: NEW_XX[1]
Message: Use simply 'invention'.
Suggestion: invention
...hone might seem to be irrelevant to the new invention of smart phone, as they had nothing to ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 738, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a collective way" with adverb for "collective"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...In fact, knowledge has been accumulated in a collective way and have lots of potentials that can br...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 871, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[2]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'of the greatest'.
Suggestion: of the greatest
...an find another example in physics. One of greatest scientific achievements in modern histo...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 1011, Rule ID: DOUBLE_PUNCTUATION
Message: Two consecutive dots
Suggestion: .
...ased on the Newton's law of gravity.. Although the relative theory revealed t...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, nevertheless, so, for example, i think, in conclusion, in fact
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 19.5258426966 82% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.4196629213 97% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 14.8657303371 61% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.3162921348 124% => OK
Pronoun: 24.0 33.0505617978 73% => OK
Preposition: 73.0 58.6224719101 125% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 12.9106741573 46% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2356.0 2235.4752809 105% => OK
No of words: 440.0 442.535393258 99% => OK
Chars per words: 5.35454545455 5.05705443957 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.57997565096 4.55969084622 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.13854996261 2.79657885939 112% => OK
Unique words: 218.0 215.323595506 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.495454545455 0.4932671777 100% => OK
syllable_count: 723.6 704.065955056 103% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 6.24550561798 96% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.99550561798 120% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.10617977528 193% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.77640449438 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.38483146067 160% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.2370786517 89% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 23.0359550562 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 63.0718040739 60.3974514979 104% => OK
Chars per sentence: 130.888888889 118.986275619 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.4444444444 23.4991977007 104% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.77777777778 5.21951772744 92% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 7.80617977528 77% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 10.2758426966 107% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 5.13820224719 19% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.83258426966 124% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.119257694499 0.243740707755 49% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0486520185692 0.0831039109588 59% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0381315208258 0.0758088955206 50% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0995523121544 0.150359130593 66% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0497687252784 0.0667264976115 75% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.0 14.1392134831 113% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 48.8420337079 96% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.1743820225 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.05 12.1639044944 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.85 8.38706741573 106% => OK
difficult_words: 112.0 100.480337079 111% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 11.8971910112 101% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.2143820225 103% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.