A nation should require all of its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.
It is lucid that a unified educational system will be able to support equal opportunities in the field of education. Nevertheless, a monolithic system will compromise the diversity of the society and it may also lead to an obsession in private education.
First of all, by providing a unified curriculum all students participating in education will get an equal chance of education and thus an equal opportunity to enroll in universities. In Korea, there are special purpose high schools such as foreign language high schools. These school, which are notorious for their high admission fees, provides special education for rich students even if they are not proficient in foreign language. Since they have access to these special educations which are favorable to university entrance exams, they are in a propitious situation when applying to universities. However, due to their grandiose admission fees, most parents are not able to afford sending their children to those academies. However, if the government decides to apply a uniform system of education, these disparities will vanish and will lead to a fair competing environment.
Nevertheless, there is still the possibility that even if the government enforces a uniform educational system, rich parents will afford private education anyway so the unfairness of education will not be able to expurgate. For instance, private afterschool institutions and tutors have become more popular ever since the Korean government has tried to enforce a single educational curriculum. While students who are from a penurious family cannot afford additional education and has to focus on school lectures, students who are from families that can afford theses subsidiary educations will be able to have a head start in the college entrance exams. Consequently, a unified education cannot solve disparity and may result in a private education boom.
In addition, the fallacy of a monolithic education is that is hinders diversity. Students are very different from each other, and they all have different strengths. Although a single educational system may produce well-rounded individuals, it may fail to further strengthen some strong points of certain students. For instance, North Korea has constructed science high schools for the gifted in order to strengthen their national power. They have been able to nurture student's with a keen judgement and insight in these fields and these students provide diversity into the society. Also, in France, there are schools that focus on arts and music so that talented students can grow up into renown artists. Hence, it by providing diverse education the society will become more colorful.
In conclusion, although a single system of education may seem appropriate in the sense that it provides equal starting points, the unfairness of education cannot be simply mitigated by it. In contrast, it only hampers diversity and will result in an insipid society.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 687, Rule ID: AFFORD_VBG[1]
Message: This verb is used with infinitive: 'to send'.
Suggestion: to send
...es, most parents are not able to afford sending their children to those academies. Howe...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, anyway, consequently, first, hence, however, if, may, nevertheless, so, still, then, thus, well, while, as for, as to, for instance, in addition, in conclusion, in contrast, such as, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.5258426966 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 20.0 12.4196629213 161% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 14.8657303371 74% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.3162921348 106% => OK
Pronoun: 29.0 33.0505617978 88% => OK
Preposition: 59.0 58.6224719101 101% => OK
Nominalization: 27.0 12.9106741573 209% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2500.0 2235.4752809 112% => OK
No of words: 462.0 442.535393258 104% => OK
Chars per words: 5.41125541126 5.05705443957 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.63618218583 4.55969084622 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.93340437517 2.79657885939 105% => OK
Unique words: 217.0 215.323595506 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.469696969697 0.4932671777 95% => OK
syllable_count: 802.8 704.065955056 114% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 6.24550561798 128% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.10617977528 161% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.38483146067 160% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.2370786517 104% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 23.0359550562 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.6494188861 60.3974514979 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 119.047619048 118.986275619 100% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.0 23.4991977007 94% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.57142857143 5.21951772744 183% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 7.80617977528 13% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 10.2758426966 136% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 5.13820224719 39% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.83258426966 103% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0844690624826 0.243740707755 35% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0283928198273 0.0831039109588 34% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0302452084574 0.0758088955206 40% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0504114760066 0.150359130593 34% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0241755304317 0.0667264976115 36% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.1 14.1392134831 107% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 40.69 48.8420337079 83% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.1 12.1743820225 108% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.1 12.1639044944 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.66 8.38706741573 103% => OK
difficult_words: 115.0 100.480337079 114% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 11.8971910112 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.2143820225 96% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.7820224719 93% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 16.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.