Some people argue that successful leaders in government, industry, or other fields must be highly competitive. Other people claim that in order to be successful, a leader must be willing and able to cooperate with others.
Cooperation and competition are two features very expressed in our lives nowadays. Many schools prefers to enrich children's skills that in the future will help them to excel in the environment of multinationals and industries, such as competition. In contrast, some schools agrees with the equilibrium among collegues and help young people to flourish abilities to cooperate with people, skill that will help them to achieve good negotiations for their employer or sometimes, a good contract. Therefore, I believe that the best way to prepare its young people is to help them develop skills that its lacking on their natural behavior. Also, help them to have essential abilities that society demands.
Nowadays, it is extremely important cooperation and competition. First of all, without cooperation we cannot achieve anything. Young people need to understand that everything is interdependent, which means, none state, government, industry, company can prosper by itself. It needs cooperation among countries and industries to achieve something. For instance, Europe needs to import a great amount of gas to help their industries, therefore, imports petroleum from Saudi Arabia, Venezuela, or Russia. United States lacks people with engeneers skills, that is why they need people from India to help them. Cooperation is essential for survivol. Without it, we have the scarcity of many things.
On the other hand we also need competition skill, especially if you are going to work in some multinacional. Unfornately, we live in a society that is necessary this ability to flourish in some work. If you are working in companies such as Procter and Gramble, Nestle, Ambev, you need to be competitive. This ability will help you to be promoted and enrich your knowledge about your department. When we are competitive, we have eager to grow and to achieve our goals, And that is the kind of skill that some company are willing to see on you. Competition leads leadership. None company president or director is not competitive. They are always trying to be better than their competitor, or to excel according to the niche of industry that they encounter.
In conclusion, both sense of cooperation and competition are important in the society nowadays. So, the best way to prepare young people is to help them to improve those abilities. For instance to help them enhance their cooperation skill, professors can give some United Nations simulation, in which each student is a country and they need to find a solution for a worldwide conflict. Futhermore, to enhence their ability of competition, schools could give some challenge for students to do. Students that win this competition, will gain some extra point in the test.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 97, Rule ID: AGREEMENT_SENT_START[1]
Message: You should probably use 'prefer'.
Suggestion: prefer
...sed in our lives nowadays. Many schools prefers to enrich childrens skills that in the ...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 597, Rule ID: IT_IS[7]
Message: Did you mean 'it's' (='it is') instead of 'its' (possessive pronoun)?
Suggestion: it's; it is
...ple is to help them develop skills that its lacking on their natural behavior. Also...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, hence, if, so, therefore, as to, for instance, in conclusion, in contrast, kind of, such as, first of all, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.5258426966 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.4196629213 105% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 14.8657303371 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.3162921348 133% => OK
Pronoun: 55.0 33.0505617978 166% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 64.0 58.6224719101 109% => OK
Nominalization: 23.0 12.9106741573 178% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2292.0 2235.4752809 103% => OK
No of words: 438.0 442.535393258 99% => OK
Chars per words: 5.23287671233 5.05705443957 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.57476223824 4.55969084622 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.93984858481 2.79657885939 105% => OK
Unique words: 214.0 215.323595506 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.488584474886 0.4932671777 99% => OK
syllable_count: 707.4 704.065955056 100% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 6.24550561798 160% => OK
Article: 2.0 4.99550561798 40% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.77640449438 169% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.38483146067 160% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 20.2370786517 128% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 23.0359550562 69% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 49.9093260664 60.3974514979 83% => OK
Chars per sentence: 88.1538461538 118.986275619 74% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.8461538462 23.4991977007 72% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.26923076923 5.21951772744 101% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 18.0 10.2758426966 175% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 5.13820224719 19% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.83258426966 145% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.155465606054 0.243740707755 64% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0444420957903 0.0831039109588 53% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0309802236666 0.0758088955206 41% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0943211001347 0.150359130593 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0250129069501 0.0667264976115 37% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.6 14.1392134831 82% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 55.24 48.8420337079 113% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.1743820225 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.76 12.1639044944 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.22 8.38706741573 98% => OK
difficult_words: 105.0 100.480337079 104% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 11.8971910112 126% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.2143820225 75% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.