Some people believe that in order to thrive a society must put its own overall success before the well being of its individual citizens Others believe that the well being of a society can only be measured by the general welfare of all its people

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Some people believe that in order to thrive, a society must put its own overall success before the well-being of its individual citizens. Others believe that the well-being of a society can only be measured by the general welfare of all its people.

After the nuclear bombardment of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, it was the cooperation among all members of the Japanese nation, which provided grounds for the resurrection of Japan. For a country to thrive, thus, it is needed that each member plays his/her role, so we should care about the well-being of each individual as they are elements of society. At the same time, there is another view, telling that the overall success should be prioritized over the general well-being. In what follows the both views will be discussed.

To begin with, some people believe that emphasize on the successes of a s...

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emphasize on the successes of a society can distract
emphasis on the successes of a society can distract

since the government do not care for people’s food
since the government does not care for people’s food

flaws:
The outlines are OK now. Sentences need to be polished.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 466 350
No. of Characters: 2318 1500
No. of Different Words: 222 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.646 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.974 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.723 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 175 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 135 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 86 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 58 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.3 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.44 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.45 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.327 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.525 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.126 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5