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Some people believe that in order to thrive, a society must put its own overall success before the well-being of its individual citizens. Others believe that the well-being of a society can only be measured by the general welfare of all its people.

Essay topics: Some people believe that in order to thrive, a society must put its own overall success before the well-being of its individual citizens. Others believe that the well-being of a society can only be measured by the general welfare of all its people.

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After the nuclear bombardment of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, it was the cooperation among all members of the Japanese nation, which provided grounds for the resurrection of Japan. For a country to thrive, thus, it is needed that each member plays his/her role, so we should care about the well-being of each individual as they are elements of society. At the same time, there is another view, telling that the overall success should be prioritized over the general well-being. In what follows the both views will be discussed.

To begin with, some people believe that emphasize on the successes of a society can distract the society from concerning the general well-being of the individuals. As mentioned in the introduction, society should care for all the members, since each member participates in making his/her society successful. By prioritizing the triumphs of a society, governments are prone to become remiss in providing general well-being. Consider the military achievement of North Korea. Undoubtedly, every nation requires military power to save its integrity. But in North Korea such a preservation is at the price of people suffering from malnutrition, since the government do not care for people’s food and their well-being as much as its missiles. Hence, we should not put the overall success before the well-being of its individual citizens.

However, not every individual’s interest accords with that of society, and overdue concern for all members can hinder the society toward gaining its successes. In every corner of the democratic world, we see that there are members who are not in accord with the interests of their community. There are people who do not bother themselves with working, and are addicted to alcohol, drugs and etcetera. Even worse, there are fringes and selfish groups who try to take advantage of the others to make their own lives, no matter how much this will harm their society. We see that the concerns for the well-being of the general population also needs its limitations, untrammeled concerns for each member would not have the proper results as ignoring them for achieving societal successes does not.

Finally, only by a balanced approach do a society can thrive; a society should make infrastructures for the public’s well-being, and at the same time should focus on its successes not to lag behind the other societies. By this approach, using its budget, a society provides enough jobs for the citizens to have incomes for themselves and their families to have a well-being, and it spends the remaining budget for the society’s achievements to stand in the global arena.

In short, as discussed, indeed the well-being of each citizen should be the concern of each society. However, this should be in a controlled and balanced way not to hinder a society from succeeding in special parts.

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emphasize on the successes of a society can distract
emphasis on the successes of a society can distract

since the government do not care for people’s food
since the government does not care for people’s food

flaws:
The outlines are OK now. Sentences need to be polished.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 466 350
No. of Characters: 2318 1500
No. of Different Words: 222 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.646 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.974 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.723 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 175 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 135 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 86 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 58 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.3 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.44 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.45 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.327 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.525 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.126 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5

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