The charts below show the numbers of people in different aged groups who go sailing and or play basketball in Australia Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

Essay topics:

The charts below show the numbers of people in different aged groups who go sailing and or play basketball in Australia.
Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

Given are bar charts which illustrate the numbers of Australian participants in sailing and playing basketball divided by different age groups and genders.

Overall, the number of male are always higher than female. The popularity of basketball is very popular in teenagers, whereas the majority of sailing participants are adults.

Firstly, the differences of participants between genders can be seen noticeably in sailing. Sailors who are 25 year old and over contribute to men much more than women. By 90,000, 70,000 and 12,000 people, these are the differential numbers of two genders from the 25-34 group, the 35-44 group and the 45 and over, respectively. In contrast, the differences of male and female participants in basketball are insignificantly. Both female and male players are approximately 22,000 in the 25-34 group, 19,000 in the 35-44 group and 10,000 in the oldest group.

Lastly, the trends of two sports are reversed as the sailing are played mostly by older groups, while the basketball is a much younger sport. Only 80,000 sailors are from the 18-24 group but the total participants in sailing rises to 22,000 and 23,000 in the 25-34 and the 45 and over groups. However, the majority of basketball players are in the 18-24 and the 25-34 groups as the figures are 70,000 people and 50,000 people, respectively.

Votes
Average: 7.3 (3 votes)

Comments

the number of male are always higher than female.
the number of male is always higher than that (the number) of female.

By 90,000, 70,000 and 12,000 people, these are the differential numbers of two genders from the 25-34 group, the 35-44 group and the 45 and over, respectively.
Description: can you re-write this sentence?

while the basketball is a much younger sport.
while the basketball is a sport for much younger people.

the total participants in sailing rises to 22,000
the total participants in sailing rise to 22,000

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 11 10
No. of Words: 218 200
No. of Characters: 1087 1000
No. of Different Words: 104 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.843 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.986 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.744 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 84 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 52 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 28 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 24 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.818 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.058 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.545 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.397 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.616 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.051 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4