Write an essay of 350 words on the following topic More and more children are performing their talents on reality shows Some people welcome this as a way to nurture young talents others are worried that rising to fame at such an early age may disrupt chil

Essay topics:

Write an essay of 350 words on the following topic:
More and more children are performing their talents on reality shows. Some people welcome this as a way to nurture young talents; others are worried that rising to fame at such an early age may disrupt children’s personal development.
Present argumentation to highlight your opinion on this matter. Give reasons and specific examples to support your opinion(s).

Nowadays, it is trendy that a number of children participating in reality shows to perform their talents. It is thought by some that it is a good way to enhance those young talents, meanwhile, others believe this trend deteriorate children’s individual development. I would argue that performing talents publicly brings more drawbacks.
On the one hand, there are two reasons for the approval. Firstly, registering at TV shows or game shows is an opportunity for children to perform and show their skills as well as what they are good at. Furthermore, had children not been on reality shows, they would not have gained confidence and self- believe which are two crucial elements to lead a positive attitude towards life. Secondly, thanks to public performances, they can be provided with feedbacks not only from the examiners, guests but also from the audience. Therefore, they may speculate and realize whether they are on the right track, which continues this professional career or not. For example, Vietnam Got Talents which is a popular variety show where children show their innate talent and trained skills has been a very first step for many young participants to be favourite artists.
On the other hand, being on broadcast shows from an early age does harm to children. The first harmful effect is that the state of being famous and recognised by many people even in daily life caused exposed to private life and devalue individualism. It is obvious that young artists' joining events, going to school and test results have been on daily news and tabloids. Therefore, things easily get out of these youngsters’ hand and they may not feel the needed safety. Regarding the second negative effect, the fame earned from variety show has two sides which either praise children or discourage them. The young gifted can receive a bunch of compliments, including exaggerated ones when they do well and consequently, prone to be disrespectful towards others. Meanwhile, when they stuck to some mistakes or mishaps, they are decidedly under a great pressure of criticism, causing mental illness and depression. Finally, in an attempt to comfort the public eye, talented teenagers tend to alter themselves. For instance, maturity has been a trendy concept in many arts product, therefore, the more mature their appearance is, the more famous they are likely to become. Undoubtedly, the young get lost and fade their original personality traits away.
In conclusion, in hope of protecting children from early fame harms, it is a joint activity between their parents and the public in a way which contemplates rigorously and controls strictly children activities.

Votes
Average: 9.5 (5 votes)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 1072, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'arts'' or 'art's'?
Suggestion: arts'; art's
...urity has been a trendy concept in many arts product, therefore, the more mature the...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, finally, first, firstly, furthermore, if, may, regarding, second, secondly, so, therefore, well, while, for example, for instance, in conclusion, as well as, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 13.1623246493 182% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 7.85571142285 76% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 10.4138276553 182% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 7.30460921844 178% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 24.0651302605 137% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 46.0 41.998997996 110% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.3376753507 72% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2243.0 1615.20841683 139% => OK
No of words: 432.0 315.596192385 137% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.19212962963 5.12529762239 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55901411391 4.20363070211 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.81447118852 2.80592935109 100% => OK
Unique words: 248.0 176.041082164 141% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.574074074074 0.561755894193 102% => OK
syllable_count: 680.4 506.74238477 134% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 5.43587174349 166% => OK
Article: 6.0 2.52805611222 237% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 1.0 2.10420841683 48% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.76152304609 126% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 16.0721442886 124% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.2975951904 103% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.1559900844 49.4020404114 85% => OK
Chars per sentence: 112.15 106.682146367 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.6 20.7667163134 104% => OK
Discourse Markers: 10.0 7.06120827912 142% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.01903807615 20% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.67935871743 138% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.9879759519 100% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 3.4128256513 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.222389258595 0.244688304435 91% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0671698278907 0.084324248473 80% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0530047061728 0.0667982634062 79% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.153484361478 0.151304729494 101% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0519015760562 0.056905535591 91% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.8 13.0946893788 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 50.2224549098 100% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 11.3001002004 102% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.82 12.4159519038 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.25 8.58950901804 108% => OK
difficult_words: 125.0 78.4519038076 159% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 9.78957915832 87% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.1190380762 103% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.7795591182 83% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 84.2696629213 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.