TPO-34 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?Educating children is a more difficult task today than it was in the past because they spend so much time on cell phone, online games, and social networking Web site.
Needless to say, today children's life is different than that of past generations which technological devices is inevitable part of their life. This brings up a highly controversial topic whether educating children considerably is arduous task for teachers with the advent of cell phone, online games and so on or not. I believe that it is difficult for people, especially for educator, teach something for young children. The reasons behind this viewpoint are connected to lack of concentrate in classes as well as after-school entertainment, which I will explore them in the following paragraphs.
To begin with, technological devices distract student in the classrooms. In other words, when students bring their cell phone into classrooms, they devote their time on using them in order to surf in the Internet, send massages to friend and so forth. All of these tasks cause students to not pay attention to class discussion, leading difficulty for teachers to educate them. My own experience provides an illuminating insight into this fact. I am a high school student. One day, when I was listening to teachers' lecture, I saw that some of my classmates were using their mobile phone. I observed that one of my classmate was surfing in the Internet for the sake of locating information regarding newly introduced laptop computer. Moreover, I turned around and suddenly I saw that a student sitting in the back raw secretly was talking by his phone with his girlfriend. I had not had known these fact before I looked deeply to all of my classmates' faces. By performing these trivial tasks in the classes, my teacher had hard time to force them to give a heed to class discussion. Therefore, educating young children is significantly difficult task to do because of using technological devices such as cell phones in the classes.
The second point worth discussing is related to children's after class activities. In fact, nowadays, every child has a personal computer in his or her house. Children installed video games on their computer in order to play games. The practice of playing games in going to a common thing for student, as they invite their friend to together house while dedicating their whole time to playing computer games. This resulted in negative consequences for young children since they do not review class material well, causing not to prepare for classes. For instance, as I previously mentioned, my classmates use their cell phone in the classroom but this is not the whole story. They gather together at their homes for the sake of involving in games, not enabling them to study for the next session. Not only did not they comprehend class material well, but also they did not take an advantage of their free time. As a result of this, children are not well-prepared for new topic that teachers will describe and thus they ask a wealth of questions concerning last sessions. This makes teachers to have difficulty in finishing and introducing new theory to students. Hence, technology makes it impossible to teach children more easily than the past.
In conclusion according to above-mentioned factors, I contend that the technology makes it difficult for teachers to educate students due to not focusing on class material and playing games after classes instead of studying.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 52, Rule ID: RATHER_THEN[2]
Message: Did you mean 'different 'from''? 'Different than' is often considered colloquial style.
Suggestion: from
... say, today childrens life is different than that of past generations which technolo...
^^^^
Line 2, column 219, Rule ID: MASSAGE_MESSAGE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'messages'?
Suggestion: messages
... in order to surf in the Internet, send massages to friend and so forth. All of these ta...
^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 891, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this fact' or 'these facts'?
Suggestion: this fact; these facts
...ith his girlfriend. I had not had known these fact before I looked deeply to all of my cla...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 226, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ames after classes instead of studying.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, hence, if, look, moreover, regarding, second, so, therefore, thus, well, while, for instance, in conclusion, in fact, such as, as a result, as well as, in other words, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 15.1003584229 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 2.0 9.8082437276 20% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 64.0 43.0788530466 149% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 89.0 52.1666666667 171% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2759.0 1977.66487455 140% => OK
No of words: 546.0 407.700716846 134% => OK
Chars per words: 5.05311355311 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.83390555256 4.48103885553 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.84398739445 2.67179642975 106% => OK
Unique words: 281.0 212.727598566 132% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.514652014652 0.524837075471 98% => OK
syllable_count: 842.4 618.680645161 136% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 9.59856630824 156% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 20.6003584229 131% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 43.4633377503 48.9658058833 89% => OK
Chars per sentence: 102.185185185 100.406767564 102% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.2222222222 20.6045352989 98% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.11111111111 5.45110844103 130% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 3.85842293907 233% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.88709677419 205% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.194304779309 0.236089414692 82% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0554103200101 0.076458572812 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0534450364852 0.0737576698707 72% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.117071462853 0.150856017488 78% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0514856002404 0.0645574589148 80% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.5 11.7677419355 106% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 58.1214874552 103% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.01 10.9000537634 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.36 8.01818996416 104% => OK
difficult_words: 129.0 86.8835125448 148% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 10.002688172 120% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.