Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Essay topics:

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?

Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now.

Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Today's world is in the grip of media. Even though media provides a lot of information to the public ,everyone needs a lack of disturbance from others in their life .The same applies for the celebrities and game players. I feel this way for two reasons which I will explain in the following paragraph.

Firstly, athletes need to constantly practise to keep up their records. The time that they devote to their improvement is therefore very important in their career. Yet, if they focus on attention seeking by giving more screen appearance like doing many advertisements they will soon lose their performance. likewise, they will lack their concentration in games against their competent who might be weak. Hence, it is important to reduce their attention seeking behaviour and be more ardent in their tasks by maintaining more private life.

Secondly, celebrities are also a human being who does not seek to publish about their entire personal life to the public. they would also like to keep secrets. How will a person feel if there are cameras intruding your dining room? Nobody is comfortable about this scenario. likewise, if unknown people get to the whereabouts of the famous people and disturbs their family members it would be really difficult for them to survive. The entertainers are to make life exciting and enjoyable they are not the people to be disturbed all the time. therefore, it is imperative to give more privacy in their life.

However, it is not possible to complete avoid the media from obtaining the information of the famous personal. Some of them can be inspiring and motivational. For instance, the life of Steve Jobs who is an Amerrican business entrepreneur and the owner of Apple company will be worthwhile to watch. Similarly, the struggles and life hurdles faced by the famous people to reach their present heights will be helpful to many youngsters in their life. therefore, if properly utilised the media access to the personal life streaming of famous people with their permission will be helpful to all.

To conclude, I believe it is necessary to provide more privacy to athletes and celebrities.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 100, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...vides a lot of information to the public ,everyone needs a lack of disturbance fro...
^^
Line 1, column 164, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...of disturbance from others in their life .The same applies for the celebrities and...
^^
Line 1, column 166, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: The
... disturbance from others in their life .The same applies for the celebrities and ga...
^^^
Line 5, column 308, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Likewise
... they will soon lose their performance. likewise, they will lack their concentration in ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 123, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: They
...eir entire personal life to the public. they would also like to keep secrets. How wi...
^^^^
Line 9, column 276, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Likewise
...ody is comfortable about this scenario. likewise, if unknown people get to the whereabou...
^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 543, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Therefore
...he people to be disturbed all the time. therefore, it is imperative to give more privacy ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 449, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Therefore
...lpful to many youngsters in their life. therefore, if properly utilised the media access ...
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, firstly, hence, however, if, likewise, really, second, secondly, similarly, so, therefore, while, for instance, i feel

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 15.1003584229 139% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 5.0 11.0286738351 45% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 35.0 43.0788530466 81% => OK
Preposition: 52.0 52.1666666667 100% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1806.0 1977.66487455 91% => OK
No of words: 356.0 407.700716846 87% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.07303370787 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.34372677135 4.48103885553 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.74724701811 2.67179642975 103% => OK
Unique words: 189.0 212.727598566 89% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.530898876404 0.524837075471 101% => OK
syllable_count: 562.5 618.680645161 91% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.94265232975 20% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 20.1344086022 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 41.6864442857 48.9658058833 85% => OK
Chars per sentence: 86.0 100.406767564 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.9523809524 20.6045352989 82% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.2380952381 5.45110844103 114% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.5376344086 144% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0971363696331 0.236089414692 41% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0358645272802 0.076458572812 47% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0325514078255 0.0737576698707 44% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0671054035274 0.150856017488 44% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0310818558077 0.0645574589148 48% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.9 11.7677419355 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 55.24 58.1214874552 95% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.83 10.9000537634 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.29 8.01818996416 103% => OK
difficult_words: 87.0 86.8835125448 100% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 10.0537634409 84% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.