People today spend too much time on personal enjoyment-doing things they like to do-rather than doing things they should do. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Some people think people today spend too much time on their own pleasure rather than doing things they are supposed to do. However, in my opinion, I think people spend their time properly as balancing between what they should do and what they like to do.

To begin with, people can enjoy things they like while processing the thing they have to do. Nowadays, technologies are strikingly improved. By using several methods, people can do multi-tasks and take up their jobs for the machines. Take the example of my cousin working in an IT company. I’ve never seen him going to his work and he said he does not have to go to physical workplaces because he worked at home with his laptop and several software programs he has. He usually does his works while watching television or playing the RPG game with a different computer. It seems odd, but all he has to do is making a program or setting up the process of the application, so he needs to be wait anyway until the computer is processed his input. He uses up this time with enjoying his favorite game and TV programs.

On top of that, people still spend a large amount of time in their workplaces. In my country, ordinary people, called salarymen, work almost 12hours in a day, extra work in the evening but had an only weekend day-off.
I do think it is necessary to spend their time for relax and refreshment to facilitate their tasks or projects at work. Work, which can be representative of what people should do, could not be your main purpose of living but means to survive. Therefore, my country will implement a new labor regulation, working 52hours a week. It looks a small amount, isn’t it? It takes so long to achieve this regulation.

To sum up, I strongly believe people today do not spend too much on personal enjoyment because they have other ways to complete what they should do and they still do a lot of work even though they are engaged in enjoyable activities.

Votes
Average: 6.6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 276, Rule ID: DT_PRP[1]
Message: Possible typo. Did you mean 'an' or 'IT'?
Suggestion: an; IT
...ake the example of my cousin working in an IT company. I've never seen him going...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 282, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'companies'?
Suggestion: companies
...e example of my cousin working in an IT company. I've never seen him going to his ...
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
anyway, but, however, if, look, so, still, therefore, while, as to, i think, in my opinion, to begin with, to sum up, on top of that

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 15.1003584229 60% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 2.0 11.0286738351 18% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 46.0 43.0788530466 107% => OK
Preposition: 47.0 52.1666666667 90% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1604.0 1977.66487455 81% => OK
No of words: 348.0 407.700716846 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.6091954023 4.8611393121 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.31911543099 4.48103885553 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.5150951329 2.67179642975 94% => OK
Unique words: 196.0 212.727598566 92% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.563218390805 0.524837075471 107% => OK
syllable_count: 490.5 618.680645161 79% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 3.51792114695 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 50.4843209984 48.9658058833 103% => OK
Chars per sentence: 89.1111111111 100.406767564 89% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.3333333333 20.6045352989 94% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.33333333333 5.45110844103 135% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.88709677419 164% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.432305391833 0.236089414692 183% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.135099728927 0.076458572812 177% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.172392882135 0.0737576698707 234% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.273463371429 0.150856017488 181% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.193936303386 0.0645574589148 300% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.9 11.7677419355 84% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 69.11 58.1214874552 119% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.3 10.1575268817 82% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.46 10.9000537634 87% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.66 8.01818996416 96% => OK
difficult_words: 68.0 86.8835125448 78% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 6.0 10.002688172 60% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 66.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.