Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?

Essay topics:

Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?

Since the aim of participating in the school is to train children to be prepared for real-life issues, it is very sensational how to teach them to face challenges such as fulfilling a task and getting high scores in school. Although some people might adhere to the idea that giving money as reward to children in school is a practical approach, others believe that it is not a good idea to motivate students by money. From my point of view, paying money to students when they achieve high grade in the school is not a suitable way for nurturing children. I will elaborate on my reasons through the following paragraphs.

To start with, it is worthy to mention that by considering money as a reward for encouraging students to study more and get higher scores, children will be focusing on earning money instead of learning in school after a while. The main reason that students get marks in school is that to let them know how their learning process is evaluated, and if they should try more. So, offering money after reaching high marks in the school, will change the purpose of exams and classes. Take a personal experience as an example: my youngest brother was not doing very well in the school, therefor, my parents started to make him galvanized by keep paying money or buying expensive thing for him. His results got better and better: the more they gave him the reward, the more he tried to study. It is not far from the imagination that my parents were sure that my brother was a hard-working student now. Based on this assumption, they stopped buying him new things the next year. As it is predictable, my brother refused to study and his grades were too poor again. It is a commonly held belief that putting effort on learning in school should be based on an eternal desire, because external factors could be simply cut.

Another reason I would like to bring up is that children should learn the fact that making a better future for themselves does not always come with an award. People do many actions in their lives to make improvements and breakthroughs, but only very little of those will be appreciated. Students should be taught that trying and learning are personal issues and they cannot expect receive prizes after doing a favor for themselves. They should know that not only some efforts do not face appreciation, but also sometimes people will not make a success in their lives even though they have been working hard to achieve it.

To make a long story short, I hold the view that paying money to school-age children is not the best idea because it will distract children from concentrating on learning, and it will deprive them from getting the insight that not all of our actions are getting a reward.

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, so, well, while, such as, to start with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 26.0 15.1003584229 172% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 9.8082437276 163% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.0286738351 136% => OK
Pronoun: 58.0 43.0788530466 135% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 60.0 52.1666666667 115% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2257.0 1977.66487455 114% => OK
No of words: 482.0 407.700716846 118% => OK
Chars per words: 4.68257261411 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.68556276237 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.50192415751 2.67179642975 94% => OK
Unique words: 241.0 212.727598566 113% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.5 0.524837075471 95% => OK
syllable_count: 673.2 618.680645161 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 20.1344086022 129% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 56.3413592792 48.9658058833 115% => OK
Chars per sentence: 125.388888889 100.406767564 125% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.7777777778 20.6045352989 130% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.0 5.45110844103 55% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.5376344086 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.373171616068 0.236089414692 158% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.111260757871 0.076458572812 146% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0775847917721 0.0737576698707 105% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.225666351822 0.150856017488 150% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0808576335979 0.0645574589148 125% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.0 11.7677419355 119% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 62.01 58.1214874552 107% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.16 10.9000537634 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.04 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 95.0 86.8835125448 109% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 17.5 10.002688172 175% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.0537634409 123% => OK
text_standard: 18.0 10.247311828 176% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.