TPO-20 - Independent Writing Task
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Successful people try new things and take risks rather than only doing what they know how to do well.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Try new things and take risks are the most critical concerns of successful people. Needless to say that every technology and new inventions bring from creative mind. Some people may find new things infinitely complex and difficult to try, whereas others would take the reverse concept. Some people characterize risks as more negative things since they fear from. Nevertheless, I firmly of the belief that create new things and experiences as essential parts of being successful. The following reasons are going to substantiate my stand-points.
The first fact that holds me this idea is that exciting moment and wonderful life which come from high-risk stuff. It can be illustrated, that everywhere you look is full of new inventions and technologies which are creations of genius mind. In fact, human welfare today is actually consequence of people, whom put their life on extreme risks. For example, when I was persuading my family business at the bakery equipment distribution company a few years ago, I realized our high demand to make and distribute more products; hence, I spoke to my dad in order to increase our investment area. In the beginning, he disagrees with my purpose but eventually, he becomes positive. After a year, I achieved fantastic opportunities and make our company number one in Iran market, and win a reward from the government. Thus, this opportunity wouldn't occur if I didn't take my career on the risk.
Another reason is that lots of remarkable experiences which come by any new afford. I read several articles in Iranian young start-up journal about one year ago. They analyze the various impact of risks on their lives; hence, assume that they risk a lot on their entire life and in all cases they defeated many times totally. On of the articles, assumes that approximately 90 percent of young start-up people take a risk more than 12 times before becoming successful. I can remember, my personal experience when I was studying the power electronics at Sharif university nine years ago. I tried to create a new website about organic farm product to sell them online; hence, I make extra afford and after a while, I realized that it's soon to sell things on the internet in our country. But, after five years I get significant help from my experience on the website in my new work. Thus, it seems reasonable to assume from this experience that every afford will be positive for us even the wrong one.
In conclusion, though some may oppose the concept, successful require to try new things and taking risks. Not only, it will bring extra excitement and good health, but also it will have perfect positive impacts on human welfare. Every people should deal with a risk to know more from their character.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
Try new things and take risks are the mo...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...oing to substantiate my stand-points. The first fact that holds me this idea i...
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Line 3, column 840, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: wouldn't
... the government. Thus, this opportunity wouldnt occur if I didnt take my career on the ...
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Line 3, column 859, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...us, this opportunity wouldnt occur if I didnt take my career on the risk. Anot...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...f I didnt take my career on the risk. Another reason is that lots of remarkabl...
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Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e positive for us even the wrong one. In conclusion, though some may oppose th...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, first, hence, if, look, may, nevertheless, so, thus, whereas, while, for example, in conclusion, in fact, in all cases
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.0286738351 145% => OK
Pronoun: 57.0 43.0788530466 132% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 60.0 52.1666666667 115% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2276.0 1977.66487455 115% => OK
No of words: 463.0 407.700716846 114% => OK
Chars per words: 4.91576673866 4.8611393121 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.63868890866 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.68063359185 2.67179642975 100% => OK
Unique words: 259.0 212.727598566 122% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.55939524838 0.524837075471 107% => OK
syllable_count: 718.2 618.680645161 116% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 18.0 9.59856630824 188% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.6003584229 117% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 41.6495798298 48.9658058833 85% => OK
Chars per sentence: 94.8333333333 100.406767564 94% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.2916666667 20.6045352989 94% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.79166666667 5.45110844103 106% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.17578375345 0.236089414692 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0546457910252 0.076458572812 71% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0490125107849 0.0737576698707 66% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.121339106971 0.150856017488 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0527350730163 0.0645574589148 82% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.4 11.7677419355 97% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 58.1214874552 90% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.26 10.9000537634 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.53 8.01818996416 106% => OK
difficult_words: 116.0 86.8835125448 134% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 10.002688172 70% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.