TPO-25 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?Young people nowadays do not give enough time to helping their communities.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Younger people these days of 2018 with poor situations of economy have to work very hard as 16 hours a day to improve the quality of their life. in my opinion, people should pay attention to their community of their city, but the most important thing is, do not work very hard to lose the family time.

First, when people marry and have child, they should work hard to have better life for their family member ,but while they are working very hard they have never seen that how their child grow up , for example , when I was born in 1995 my family had serious financial problems ,they did not have own house and my father didn’t has any job, also my mom were working in hospital a long time per day, in addition she should work very hard to pay my sister fees of her university ,so my father should take care of me and everyone knows that was hard job to all the men, after some years my father found a job as a taxi driver , so my sister have to take care of me so at the end none of them have time to pay attention to the society that they live there , but now, after 24 years when we got own house and our problems solved , I’m working for social worker to help the children when they need help or they have bad parents , so if young people have not any problem in their life, they would help other people.

Second, when someone want to help unit of social helper, they cannot trust to pay money ,also most of them are cheating and saying lie to people ,for example, I live in Iran and we have place to help homeless children and generous people help them and pay money to the manager of that ,nut after one year the manager escape from Iran to America with the large number of money ,that means with all money that people pay for those children but they have never get it, so when the social workers and police went there they saw the bad situation they had, and the awful food, that was embarrassing moment, so after that, our people decide to never help the community and some of them forget about how bad the situation that children have and they continue their life.

In summarize, people help the community, because it is a human job, beside of their normal life.

Votes
Average: 6.6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 9, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[8]
Message: The proper name in singular (Younger) must be used with a third-person verb: 'peoples'.
Suggestion: peoples
Younger people these days of 2018 with poor situations...
^^^^^^
Line 2, column 146, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: In
...y to improve the quality of their life. in my opinion, people should pay attention...
^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ork very hard to lose the family time. First, when people marry and have child,...
^^^
Line 4, column 107, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...have better life for their family member ,but while they are working very hard the...
^^
Line 4, column 195, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
... never seen that how their child grow up , for example , when I was born in 1995 m...
^^
Line 4, column 209, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...at how their child grow up , for example , when I was born in 1995 my family had s...
^^
Line 4, column 276, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...my family had serious financial problems ,they did not have own house and my fathe...
^^
Line 4, column 480, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
... to pay my sister fees of her university ,so my father should take care of me and ...
^^
Line 4, column 626, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...s my father found a job as a taxi driver , so my sister have to take care of me so...
^^
Line 4, column 755, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...tion to the society that they live there , but now, after 24 years when we got own...
^^
Line 4, column 827, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...we got own house and our problems solved , I'm working for social worker to h...
^^
Line 4, column 930, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
... they need help or they have bad parents , so if young people have not any problem...
^^
Line 6, column 22, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'someone' must be used with a third-person verb: 'wants'.
Suggestion: wants
...p other people. Second, when someone want to help unit of social helper, they can...
^^^^
Line 6, column 88, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...l helper, they cannot trust to pay money ,also most of them are cheating and sayin...
^^
Line 6, column 145, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...em are cheating and saying lie to people ,for example, I live in Iran and we have ...
^^
Line 6, column 285, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...hem and pay money to the manager of that ,nut after one year the manager escape fr...
^^
Line 6, column 287, Rule ID: NUT_NOT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'not'?
Suggestion: not
...m and pay money to the manager of that ,nut after one year the manager escape from ...
^^^
Line 6, column 376, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...o America with the large number of money ,that means with all money that people pa...
^^
Line 6, column 459, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'got', 'gotten'.
Suggestion: got; gotten
... for those children but they have never get it, so when the social workers and poli...
^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, second, so, while, for example, in addition, in my opinion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 15.1003584229 53% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 13.8261648746 123% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.0286738351 136% => OK
Pronoun: 56.0 43.0788530466 130% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 51.0 52.1666666667 98% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1776.0 1977.66487455 90% => OK
No of words: 412.0 407.700716846 101% => OK
Chars per words: 4.31067961165 4.8611393121 89% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.50530610838 4.48103885553 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 1.93965296159 2.67179642975 73% => OK
Unique words: 197.0 212.727598566 93% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.478155339806 0.524837075471 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 551.7 618.680645161 89% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.3 1.51630824373 86% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 5.0 20.6003584229 24% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 82.0 20.1344086022 407% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 380.15470535 48.9658058833 776% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 355.2 100.406767564 354% => Less chars_per_sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 82.4 20.6045352989 400% => Less words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 16.0 5.45110844103 294% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 19.0 5.5376344086 343% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 11.8709677419 17% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.88709677419 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.103990189839 0.236089414692 44% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0826790154683 0.076458572812 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0270074829104 0.0737576698707 37% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0864468885456 0.150856017488 57% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0255752325368 0.0645574589148 40% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 40.1 11.7677419355 341% => Automated_readability_index is high.
flesch_reading_ease: 13.63 58.1214874552 23% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 31.7 10.1575268817 312% => Flesch kincaid grade is high.
coleman_liau_index: 8.9 10.9000537634 82% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.28 8.01818996416 116% => OK
difficult_words: 41.0 86.8835125448 47% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 17.5 10.002688172 175% => OK
gunning_fog: 34.8 10.0537634409 346% => Gunning_fog is high.
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 66.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.