TPO-26 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?It is better for children to choose jobs that are similar to their parents’ jobs than to choose jobs that are very different from their parents’ job.Use specific r

The career of people has always been a crucial point in human life because it has a direct effect on the social status of people. Some people argue over this issue of whether parents should encourage their children to have a similar job just like themselves or a different job. However, in my opinion, this choice is heavily reliant upon conditions that everybody is exposed to.

First, in a modern society, especially industrial cities, having a job that is different with parents' job is more likely to happen. In a modern society, people are increasingly surrounded by technology and social media, as a result, people are often interested in different subjects and tend to pursue their interests as their own career. Furthermore, modern cities need a broad range of educated people with different knowledge for a wide variety of occupation in industrial companies. San Francisco, for instance, is a modern city in which Silicon Valley is famous region contains highly diverse high-tech jobs and industrials. Obviously, in such a modern city, children have probably more diverse jobs than a traditional city.

Second, in traditional cities, people tend to have a job that is similar to their parents. Agriculture and animal husbandry, for instance, are two types of prevalent occupations that people use them for subsistence in traditional cities. Indeed, in these cities the diversity of careers are limited. Furthermore, people have to preserve their land and continue to produce some products like crops to survive. Consequently, children are always encouraged to pursue their parents' job as their own job.

In conclusion, unlike some people, who insist on choosing to either continue the parents' job or start a different job as a better option for children, it is my strong conviction that given the condition that people live in, they should make a decision about the type of the future job of their children.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 6, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ue their parents job as their own job. In conclusion, unlike some people, who i...
^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
consequently, first, furthermore, however, if, second, so, for instance, in conclusion, as a result, in my opinion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 9.8082437276 31% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 13.8261648746 51% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 24.0 43.0788530466 56% => OK
Preposition: 43.0 52.1666666667 82% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1613.0 1977.66487455 82% => OK
No of words: 313.0 407.700716846 77% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.15335463259 4.8611393121 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.20616286096 4.48103885553 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.78923435965 2.67179642975 104% => OK
Unique words: 168.0 212.727598566 79% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.536741214058 0.524837075471 102% => OK
syllable_count: 513.0 618.680645161 83% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 9.59856630824 31% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 20.6003584229 68% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 57.6598487968 48.9658058833 118% => OK
Chars per sentence: 115.214285714 100.406767564 115% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.3571428571 20.6045352989 109% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.14285714286 5.45110844103 149% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 11.8709677419 51% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.344444961877 0.236089414692 146% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.129859871565 0.076458572812 170% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.12389556735 0.0737576698707 168% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.238099435039 0.150856017488 158% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0536256991265 0.0645574589148 83% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.0 11.7677419355 119% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 58.1214874552 85% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.89 10.9000537634 118% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.12 8.01818996416 114% => OK
difficult_words: 87.0 86.8835125448 100% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.